Date: 03/02/09 05:05 pm Title: Chapter 3
ok...I always have to roll my eyes when someone writes a character undoing clothing with their teeth. It's just incredibly corny to me. It was funny when it was like:
"ice-cream." ...pause... "Dude is Bill in there?" -cause only Bill wants ice-cream for dinner.
Author's Response: lol, I know that is corny, but in real life it's incredibly sexy... ah, well. :D Thanks for the review *skittles 2 you*
Date: 03/02/09 05:49 am Title: Chapter 2
OMG!
Author's Response: LOL! Thank you! *Cookie*
Date: 03/01/09 11:48 pm Title: Chapter 2
please please! keep going.
=D
Author's Response: I am! Thank you for the review *cookies, cookies, cookies*
Date: 03/01/09 11:07 pm Title: Chapter 1
I have to agree with Twinsational here. (: It makes it so much easier on the eyes when you make each a space everytime someone else speaks in a dialouge or when you start a whole new paragraph entirly. It makes it so much easier on the eyes.
Other than that, The story is pretty good, and I'd love to read more.
Author's Response: Thank you :) I fixed the spacing now. *Cookie!*
Date: 03/01/09 10:32 pm Title: Chapter 2
yes you must keep going =] i want to know what tom is planing to do to bill =]
Author's Response: ^_^ Thanks *Cookie*
Date: 03/01/09 09:26 pm Title: Chapter 2
I liked it, but I have one suggestion. instead of leaving no, well, space. could you press enter every time you have a new paragraph? it'd be much easier to read. =)
thank yu and keep it up =)
Author's Response: Yes, I can do that. :) Thank you for the suggestion. *cookies*
Date: 03/01/09 07:17 pm Title: Chapter 2
please continue this its awesome
Author's Response: thank you :) *gives out another big cookie*
Date: 03/01/09 06:17 pm Title: Chapter 2
YEAH!!!! i love the cookie, it's yummy :D. and oooo the twins don't hold back, me likey :P. great chapter, it was fun to read
Author's Response: Thanks again. :)
Date: 03/01/09 05:45 pm Title: Chapter 1
you should definitely continue. it has great potential ;)
Author's Response: Thank you *gives u a great big cookie*