Date: 03/05/09 12:10 pm Title: Chapter 9
you are already writing the sequel? that's freaking awesome. i really like this story and i cant wait to read more. i'm glad you aren't rushing them into things. the longer the better. =) keep up the great work!
Author's Response: I had this story already pre-written so I've been working on the sequal for 2 weeks now ^^. So yes the sequal will be up a little after this one ends 8D. Thank you very much by the way!! I hope you review the next chapter ^^
Date: 03/03/09 05:28 pm Title: Chapter 9
yay for another chapter
Author's Response: Um thank you?
Date: 03/03/09 04:30 pm Title: Chapter 9
That was cute.. I didn't think I would enjoy it the way I do..Love you for it.
Author's Response: Really? Well I'm so glad you do ^^! I love you for you loving it lmao
Date: 03/03/09 04:12 pm Title: Chapter 9
this chapter was awesome!!!!!!! they just keep getting closer and closer to each other, even though bill tends to think otherwise. i love that they really have no clue what they're doing, i really truly think it just adds to the story, so i can't wait to see what happens next, and then the sequel!!!
Author's Response: THANK YOU 8D!!!! Gosh I love when readers point out what I was trying to write and hoping people would pick up on ^^!!
As a secret I can't wait for the sequal to be up either ;). I sit here typing it and just squirm cause I wanna know how it ends and what my readers will think of each chapter!
Date: 03/03/09 04:00 pm Title: Chapter 9
what I felt your previous chapter lacked was kind of stated here.
I felt that bill analysizing or realizing that tom is using their special connecting time for just pleasure was great. bill wants them to only use their closeness to stay together and tom has just tainted it.
I felt that the chapter was the best so far with the angst and confort. I felt it was something that needed to be address at some point it time and leave it to bill to be the logical one again. seeing that everything they do is changing for the wrong reasons.
I thought the talk was great it showed how they are relating back to the bad time with their parents. and it was a wake up call for tom. made him see what bill was getting from all this and that he didn't want to fight and end up like their parents.
oh I realized that bill considers gordon more like a father than their real father. it was kind of between the line in your story. gordon is bill father figure and his family unit not their biological father.
I felt a lot was learned or put on the table this chapter. and I was happy that they or bill just didn't except the change so easily. and wants their "connecting" to be sparce so it more special and meaningful. not like tom just because it felt good. so good for bill for putting his foot down and saying no. he wouldn't cave just for pleasure. he want a more emotional connection with their time and tom seems to want a more physical connection. but really glad tom seen the wrong of his ways.
sorry so long I just love that they are more complex and complicated in their feelings and their relationship. not many author's on this site really try to make it more of a unique relationship or worthy of real love because they always make the character's fall hard and fast without really looking at the consequences of their actions. or taking the time to really go indepth.
so so again late busy busy but I always review each chapter and I'm going to faviorite now I usually wait tell the end but I really love this story.
Author's Response: YESH! So I did good? Alright *smirks* lol
Oooo I like how you worded that "Tom just tainted it". But yes I think Tom was out of control so he needed to be put in place. Thus this chapter was created haha.
See I think it's the best so far too! I simply love it, like I said, just so many things about it that make it wonderful and is very important in this story. And with the talk I realized they never brought their real father up. Little kids don't just forget so in a fight it was the perfect time. And you can clearly see Bill doesn't have a problem bringing him up but Tom wants to hear nothing about him. Thats actually a huge hint on how they feel about the situation now. I thought it was cool how it was just slipped in there ;). Plus not only did it show that but it served a purpose like you pointed out. To wake Tom up and for readers to know Bill still thinks that they're time together is to be close. I think that would tie up confusions if there was any.
*Claps for Bill* Yes I agree good for Bill. He needs to keep his brother in check and sometimes Bill is the more responsible one. Gosh my characters are growing up so fast :O!
Don't be sorry long reviews are like better than christmas 8D!!! It really means a lot what you say, I take it all to heart and not forget about it. I don't wanna be like other authors who ignore reviews. I like my readers to know that I am reading what they have to say and that I am noticing them. To me it just seems right. I understand you completely though. I don't like reading rushed stories. Especially if it was good then something like you said ruins it...
YAY!! You faved it I'm so happy!!!! Well as a hint-only 2 more chapters left ;). But sshhhh I haven't told anyone lol. You're reviews are so awesome we should be co-authors for a story since we think a lot a like 8D!
Can't wait for your next review! I can't thank you enough ^^
Date: 03/03/09 09:04 am Title: Chapter 9
I like how you added alittle bit of angst in here...it makes the sweet scenes so much sweeter!
Author's Response: Thank you ^^! Just going by whatever comes out of my head 8). Or well did... since this was pre-wrote lol. Keep reading/Reviewing!!
Date: 03/03/09 04:01 am Title: Chapter 8
I agree with how you want your character's to be protrayed as boys that are not corrupted by the media or pop culture or today's society. them being driven on pure instinct is what makes your story so realistic and more understandable of their relationship. if they just jumped eachother there wouldn't be any special meaning to their relationship or love. they need to develop their closeness overtime because those feelings are scary and new and confusing consider their brother's. it should be the way you want it. I love see how their bond and love or relationship evolves over tiny important factor that define them and their relationship.
ok so this chapter started with a fun little game that turned into a more primal need. the need that tom felt help them find a new example of the wonders their body and love can bring. I thought the scene was good and bill's reaction was realistic with being the twin who's body and mind is less experienced with tom knowing what to do with his hard on. so I thought that tom being scared about hurting bill was great it showed that he felt guilty for forcing his brother to do something against is will. he thought that with bill saying no he should take his word serious eventhough bill didn't understand the whole meaning of the feelings tom was making his body feel. and bill reassuring tom that he made him feel good was great but after that I felt it did seem a bit rushed with them just excepting the experience so lightly and telling eachother they love eachother and drifting off to sleep. I felt there should have been more confusion about what they experienced or them to question what happen or somethings more meaningful to end their experience with but that's just my little complaint other than that it was great move forward in their life.
I would just like to point out that I appreciate all the help with your take on my opinion's. I really love when author's tell me what they want me to get out of their story or chapter. and about if I'm wrong with my assumption or are they correct. I just love to see your side and if I'm on the right track or not. and what I missed.
again I know it's late but better late than never right!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for understanding and agreeing to how I want my characters to be with each other. I personally didn't think they were too 'innocent'. Infact I don't think they're innocent at all :)
I know people always make Bill the "innocent" one and Tom the more aggresive-experienced one but in this story Tom is more aware than Bill is so thats why I think he is like that. I do apologize for rushing it. I didn't notice when typing it but when I reread it before posting it felt really rushed. But not much I could do the story is already pre-tryped. I am sorry for that it bugs me a lot T~T. And when telling each other they love 'em don't forget it's a different love than we know. They always say they love each other and they ment it brotherly and sweetly ^^. But I do understand it was lacking confusion T~T. Gosh I could really kick myself for it.
But please don't thank me. You write such wonderful reviews and type everything I wanna read. It makes me feel happy and that I'm doing something right. Plus to know I have readers who are really interested in it and serious about it ^^. I feel it is my job to reply to everyone especially when people take such the time to write awesome reviews like you do!
Date: 03/03/09 03:23 am Title: Chapter 7
ok know this is late don't even know if you'll read but I thought I should at least write down my opinion's on this chapter of this story.
so I see that they kind of had a talk about their feelings they're having. it showed their age I think a 12 yr old should be confused about the complexity of the bodies reaction to eachother. but I really love bill's logic here again he always has an answer to everything and he always make you see his side as right. one of the best part of this chapter was the whole kissing scene and the talk about their new found need to be as close as possible to eachother.
I knew that bill would use gordon and simone's relationship has a model. I really think they personify love in his eye's and in your readers.
tom was defintely right when he said things were defiantly changing. know that the boy's are getting older their relationship is evolving into something more special or how whould I put this to the next step of their unusual love.
everything is changing for them in this chapter nothing was like when they were kids and inexperienced youthfulness shows. but I like that this is very understandable. showing that tom is afraid of these new experiences he gets around bill. and that they don't really know what they really want and need from eachother.
ok the end is nice where gordon show the boys stability in their lives and makes them have nice experience with a happy family setting and great father role. he makes them want to keep him around for his positive influence in their lives.
ok hope this is a great review that you deserve.
Author's Response: YAY! I was missing your reviews ;O;!! They make me so happy :)! I say better late than never
Bill is a lil trickster and he doesn't even know it huh? I think that makes the characters alive almost. I believe they needed to talk before they did anything. It was only logical right?
Gosh you saw ahead with why Gordon and Simone's relationship was so important! Thats the big reason why they had to be brought in. They had to kind of boost and shove the twins relationship into a certain direction. Just like my summary says "Parents don't always know the effect they have on kids" ;)
Tom always seems to be more aware to the feelings around and I think as the story goes on he pushed them aside and just considers them "normal" while Bill is kind of lost and thinking it's just so they'll never be apart. I think maybe Bill has an idea but doesn't fully grasp it.
In the sequal it's fun to see how they've grown like you're saying about how you love to see their relationship change. The older they get the more they understand and change. The more of a mind they have the less naive they are but in a sense still naive. I hope that makes sense lol
And yes even though Gordon is hardly brought up he such a gentle figure in the story. I think that balances everything out
You're reviews are always great ;). Thank you for them!!!
Date: 03/03/09 01:05 am Title: Chapter 9
plz update soon thx=]
Author's Response: I will 8D! You're welcome!
Date: 03/02/09 05:14 pm Title: Chapter 8
Now that's what I call hot, can't wait for more.
Author's Response: Thank you <3!!
Date: 03/02/09 11:33 am Title: Chapter 8
I like your story and I think it's pretty realistic (I'm not sure you'll have to ask Tom an Bill..) And I love the way they discover each other. I don't believ they would be fucking like rabbits when they're 13. And this is cute, so I don't really give a F**k. Please continue, I love it. And you did a great job writing this and that's all that counts!!!!!
Big hug
Author's Response: Aslong as people like it I am happy so thank you ^^. I'm glad someone else see's, well I believe, that it's not normal to be-as you put it-"fucking like rabbits" lol.
Thank you very much for you're review it's nice to hear encouraging words from readers 8) *Big hug back* 8D!!
Date: 03/02/09 08:40 am Title: Chapter 8
The scene where Tom was chasing a screeching Bill sooo made me laugh! And nice little scene at the end... ;)
Author's Response: It was funny to imagine haha. And thank you ;)
It's the start of a wonderful relationship XD
Date: 03/02/09 07:04 am Title: Chapter 8
omg so hot
Author's Response: Thank you ;)
Date: 03/02/09 05:35 am Title: Chapter 8
This is awesome! :O
I really want to no wat happends next :D
Author's Response: Thank you ^^!
Come back tomorrow I think I'll update early ^^
Date: 03/02/09 12:46 am Title: Chapter 8
wow...i luvz this lozlz...plzplzplzpzl update sooooonnnn ththxx=]=] amd i like it=]
Author's Response: Thank you 8D! I'll update tuesday or wednesday ^^
Date: 03/01/09 11:56 pm Title: Chapter 8
this was a great chapter!!!!! i personally think that it didn't seemed rushed, but that might just be me. i love that they are progressing at their own rate, not truly knowing what they're doing. it just adds to the story.
Author's Response: Thanks so much 8D!!!! I'm just hoping it wasn't rushed but it could actually just be me. You're probably right ^^.
Yes they're taking things in their own pace. Thanks for understanding *hugs* lol
Date: 03/01/09 10:15 pm Title: Chapter 7
aww this is cute=] update soon plz
Author's Response: I just updated ^^
Author's Response: I just updated ^^
Date: 02/28/09 03:32 pm Title: Chapter 7
yay!!!!!!! they told each other about their feelings!!!!!!! gordon is soooo nice to them!!!!!! i love this chapter, it's just amazing!!!!! i love this story sooo much!!!! monday can't come soon enough... D: can't wait to find out what happens...
Author's Response: You're excitment makes me excited!! lol
I think you'll like the next chapter things are on a roll. I can't even wait to post the next chapter. Hope you review it when it's up ^^!!
Date: 02/28/09 01:42 pm Title: Chapter 7
I love how the twin's relationship has morphed throughout the chapters. It's great being able to go back and trace their interactions throught the "years". Oh, and I just want to say how endearing the twins were at the end! The way they were talking about Gordon being cool and wanting him to stick around was so sweet and genuine. Can't wait for another update!
Author's Response: It's great even for me to go back and see how they've grown with their relationship lol. And you can really tell in the sequal I'm currently writing. It's so surprising ^^.
I wanted to throw something in about what they thought of like Gordon and I think later on you'll see how they feel about Simone. Makes it more realistic
keep reading and reviewing :)
Date: 02/28/09 11:04 am Title: Chapter 7
Oh my this is interesting..I am suprised that they have still been doing that without getting caught yet...
Author's Response: Thats cause they've been secret about it. And they only really do anything when their mother leaves. But I'm sure in time they'll get sloppy and be less secretive about it.