Date: 01/14/09 08:38 am Title: What To Do
Do I want to know how David found out? :O
This is a very enthralling way to begin a fic; usually this scene comes in after a few chapters or so after first time twincest. Very tense. I liked the last bit with Tom and Bill even though it was very sad to read. Separation must mean volumes to them and you write that fear so nicely here.
Date: 01/14/09 05:55 am Title: What To Do
noooo he really can't
*sad eyes*
Date: 01/14/09 05:48 am Title: What To Do
oh man, poor twins:(
interesting beginning!
continue when you can^^
Date: 01/14/09 01:31 am Title: What To Do
this already has me crushed into pieces, so i can't expect the rest of the fic to be about pink chocolate baby bunnies, right?
Date: 01/14/09 01:06 am Title: What To Do
Let's make it official: you're better. You're so better.
I was thrilled just to see your name on this, you know that, but more importantly I was thrilled just to see your name. I love your collaborations with Maj because you guys put together such a unique voice but that's only because you both have that on your own too. You can't know what it's like to read Maj's work in her style and this in yours, both brilliant, and then see the sum of the parts in your collabs. Especially because it isn't lesser, individual work by the both of you is just as wowing as the collaborations, which is what leads me to believe that you're never going to stop getting better (self-esteem status: -shot-) because both of you push each other's talents to new heights and that's displayed even more starkly through individual projects.
And this one... is sparkly like Edward Cullen. EXCEPT IN A GOOD WAY. It ties my stomach in knots because you write so naturally - I'm an observer behind an invisible window and you don't need long drawn out descriptions to make me see everything that needs to be seen. You know how you say I see too much sometimes, well, it's only because you're talented enough to know how to show it. You know how good your dialogue is, and it seems like a simple thing because they're speaking casually but I know how much difficulty I've had with that and I know it's not. But maybe you're just a natural.
It's probably time for me to stop complaining about the angst, but NO. I REFUSE TO GIVE IN. D:< I vaguely remember you promising me a threesome with rainbows and unicorns. Vaguely. And since you're forcing me to read this through an opening chapter that's a hook big enough to catch a whale I think I deserve something happy as appeasement.
Also, lookie: "[...]tracing memorized ink over obscuring clothing." Prose! *_*
I loved, even though it hurt. Damn you for turning me into a masochist. Musey... Musey... -tugs on pant leg- happy ending please? Pretty please?
...
...
... -cling- ;_;
Date: 01/14/09 12:32 am Title: What To Do
One question: How the HELL did David find out???????????? LoL Can't wait for that answer!
Date: 01/13/09 10:58 pm Title: What To Do
So if they're not being seperated then what's gonna happen? Tom says he's not talking to a shrink so what other options do they have? Plz update cuz I want to know so bad! *begs on her knees*
Date: 01/13/09 10:52 pm Title: What To Do
That was a rush. I was hanging over the edge for the whole chapter, sort of waiting for the other shoe to drop. The suspense you've built up is nearly palpable. And by the end of the chapter, the tension is still thick and I must say, I have to know what happens next.
Excellent start on this. :]
Date: 01/13/09 10:40 pm Title: What To Do
dfdsghsdjgkjsjkgdskjjsd
you're so good. So very, very good with words. I can't even come up with words right now to tell you how much I love your addictive kind of angsty goodness.
Date: 01/13/09 10:26 pm Title: What To Do
hmm, it seems like Bill is giving in first...
Date: 01/13/09 10:13 pm Title: What To Do
Excellent beginning. Very well written! I think David would really approach them like that. I can't wait to see how the twins handle this.
Date: 01/13/09 10:10 pm Title: What To Do
Yeah, he CAN'T. ...But he can. D: The poor twinnies, what will they do? What can they do.
Date: 01/13/09 10:09 pm Title: What To Do
This one is SO gonna hurt. I look forward to it.
Author's Response: ONLINE, WOMAN!
Date: 01/13/09 09:33 pm Title: What To Do
Great start, very emotional
Date: 01/13/09 09:19 pm Title: What To Do
Eeeep. Poor twins. I am curious and intrigued where you will go from here.