aaaaaawwwwwww

ahhh i love this story its ah-mazing i cant wait to read the next chapter i think this is seriously and im nawt kidding my fav storie plzzz update soon

Author's Response: o wow, thanks so much! i'm so glad that you like it!!!!! i'll update soon!!!

goddamn woman don't keep us.. ok ok me!! in suspense!! i want it aaaaaaaaall now!! *whines a tantrum* puhleaaaaaaaaase?????????????

*gives cookies to bribe you*

Author's Response: :D thanks for the cookies....n now that i'm back @ campus i can resume getting ready to update!!!

he just really broke up this time right? damn it!

I love that storyyyy, but you update so much that I have 4 chapters to read every morning! XD

So, keep going! ;)

Author's Response: :D i'll update as soon as possilble (later today) i'm gettng ready 2 head back to campus right now! ^_^

Hmmm. I just finished chapter 4 and I'm still not quite on the same page with you. I honestly tried to give this story a chance (hence my reading up to chapter 4), but it's still missing something vital to me.

It's not that it's not written decently. God, no. That isn't the problem here at all. It's just...the interaction between Tom and Bill just isn't clicking for me.

You know how sometimes you'll be watching a t.v. series or a movie and you think that the two main characters--who are supposed to be love interests--don't have any chemistry? Well, that's how I feel with Tom and Bill here.

Like I said...it's not the plot that is not grabbing me. The premise of your story does sound intriguing, but so far I haven't actually seen any chemistry between Tom and Bill--I've only read the other characters imply that there's an attraction. And that simply cannot do. It's one thing if your other characters are teasing the main ones about an attraction, but it doesn't cut it if you can't actually see the attraction in the fic.

So far, Tom and Bill are just sniping at each other and it's mostly dialogue that is written well, but still has no emoting going on within it.

If I can't immediately connect with your main characters (or any characters really) together and separately, then I can't get into your story. Even though it's a story, your readers should be able to identify with your characters...so we can feel what they feel and root for them throughout the fic.

I'm not telling you all this to hurt you. I'm just stating my opinion and trying to be constructive about it. I would suggest after you finish this story, going back and tweaking some parts here and there to bring more emotion to your writing. Like I said, the writing is decent and grammatically correct. But it's sort of also just straightforward and I just feel detached from it. Again, this is only my opinion, and I'm in the minority, so please don't take offense. I am just being honest.

Author's Response: This didn't hurt me at all! I'm a creative writing major, so reviews like this are ones that I absolutely love the most! I'm glad you've been honest with me and love to read your opinion. I'll definitely keep your advice in mind and I've got it stored on a note in my Word document! Thanks for trying with it at least, and this comment means a lot to me, honestly! Major thanks and hugs!!!

you said tom's character wasn't good with words what was that when they made-up tom's words of wisdom were beautiful.
love the scene were tom's playing the guitar with his eye's closed and opens them to find bill crying made me want to cry and that was nice way to make-up. don't know what's next I'm always wrong anyways bill go with tom or they spend time apart a grow apart dun dun dun.

Author's Response: okay, with that, it's supposed to be, and i might have to add a note of it to the story, that though tom's not so great with words when he's worried the most of losing bill he's just hit with these words and he's no idea where they came fromrni'm glad you liked that scene! n there'll b more soon!

Reading a broken Bill is quite painful I must say. However I'm extremely glad that they made up. I bet Bill takes Tom along with him to the States. To me it sounds like the only rational thing to do.

Author's Response: :( broken bill is sad isn't he? thanks for the review! i'll post later!rn

keep it comin!

Bill knows how to throw a bitch fit LOL! I felt bad for everyone that was in his path. But I'm so glad they made up! I hated Bill being mad at Tom! You and this story make me so happy!

Author's Response: he does, doesn't he?! lol, i'm so glad you liked it! i made anony cry...when she read the part where tom was sitting behind the door, she started crying! ^_^