Date: 01/16/09 03:51 pm Title: Chapter 5
He groans involuntarily and drops his mouth to my nipple, flicking the little silver ring with his tongue. - *grins* nice!
He looks sad. “I should have been there.” – he’s missed so much. He’ll never see them as babies, never carry them when they were tiny. Oh I’m tearing up at what he’s missed. He’s a guy so it may not effect him the same way but…*pouts* still it’s sad.
“I've dreamt of this. Every night. I've waited so long.” - *scowls* then he should have gone looking for her earlier!
"Come with me.” – is this a single meaning phrase? Cause it doesn’t feel like it!
Date: 01/16/09 03:41 pm Title: Chapter 4
"It's just a bit... I don't know... I don't want to rush them. Hey boys, guess what? Meet your Daddy." – maybe a bit soon for him too…blech!!! *the sicken splashing sound as his lunch hits the toilet bowl in mouth fulls*
"The decision to be together. To stay together." – YEAH!!!!!! They’ll work it out I know they will. And if they don’t I’ll come hunt you down. *grins* Don’t think I’m not above getting a plane ticket and flying to England to take you down? Cause I’m not!
“Why do you think that was?”
He stares at me. “Because they weren't you.”
I laugh nervously. “Bill.”
“It never worked because they weren't you.” – awh!, that’s a pitiful awh!
“Georg and Gustav.” – OMG you totally got me! OMG you are AWFUL!!!!
I tell him their names and he seems happy with my choices, repeating them over and over quietly to himself. – Is it going to be like my OFC’s kid no name?
I turn to him and he looks at me, searching my face for any hint of doubt, but there is none, and in that moment, with no more talking, the decision is made. – see they belong to each other!
Date: 01/16/09 03:18 pm Title: Chapter 3
They look around, frowning. "What? We'll help you look for it Mummy." – I’m a little concerned about the boy’s vocabulary. Cause I work with kids and their concern is find but their comprehension of language is not always great. Keep that in mind. Think simple.
example …it would be more like this
"Where's Bill?" - with little worried faces they said “Uh-oh where Bill?” as they look around the kitchen.
"He's gone." – “He’s gone home.”
"OH!" They rush away from me into the front room and I hear them scrambling onto the sofa to look out the window. - They rush away from me into the front room and I hear them scrambling onto the sofa to look out the window. “There he is”
They run back in. "It's alright Mummy, he's still here!" – I head out to the living room and see them bouncing on the cushions. “Mama look, Bill” they say looking back and forth at me and Bill.
"He's having a dirty cigarette!" They make disgusted faces. "Can we play outside?" – “Ewww yucky.” They say when they see him smoking. “Yes,” I say, “smoking is yucky.” “Outside?” They say bouncing a little on the couch. “You want to play outside?” I ask. They nod their heads solemnly.
***
"I know. I know, but... you appeared to be so... in love. I couldn't bear it, it seemed so soon. Less than six months after I left and you were..." – Oh god OUCH!! How terrible!
I look straight into his eyes. "It made me think that what we had wasn't real. That what I thought I knew was all some kind of dream... some kind of lie..."
He shakes his head again, and whispers. "It was real. How could you think that?"
The tears are flowing freely from my eyes. "Because in the interview you were asked about love. You said you believed a person only ever had true love once in their life...
And you’d found it.
With her." – Oh god did you just hear that? It was the sound of my heart breaking. Oh god!
"A slut." He finishes my sentence for me. "A slut and a drunk." – well he’s being honest at least…and lets cross our fingers that he didn’t end up with any nasty STDs! (is that what their called in the UK?)
“Did she really burn all your clothes under the Brandenburg Gate?!” – oh god all his clothes?! I think the fans would attack her?!
Date: 01/16/09 02:54 pm Title: Chapter 2
With his eyes. – OMG! Oh god she didn’t tell him did she? OMG! This is going to break him! How could she have not told him? OMG!
I drop to my knees beside him and start to cry, my body is shaking as I sob. “Bill... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... I couldn't... Please try and understand... I know... I know I should have told you...”
"Yes." His voice is cold as he gets up. "You should." And with that he leaves the room and the sound of the front door slamming echoes in my ears. – I know it’s not “just like that” that he’s going to leave but she doesn’t and OMG how devastating for both of them!
Date: 01/15/09 04:33 pm Title: Chapter 8
A kiss can mean SO much!
Beautiful chapter, really touching!
You wrote it so well!
Date: 01/15/09 04:31 am Title: Chapter 8
omg i was feaking out i thought he was leaving ufffhh. cant wait for the next one
Date: 01/14/09 07:16 pm Title: Chapter 8
*skips around happily and throws confetti into the air*
Date: 01/13/09 10:09 pm Title: Chapter 8
I can't WAIT for the next installment. HUGS hunny. Again, thank you!
Date: 01/13/09 10:05 pm Title: Chapter 7
Yummy! I don't know what else to say. *Changes panties*
Date: 01/13/09 09:59 pm Title: Chapter 6
Well done! Keep it up.. what else can I say that's encouraging? Ummm I want to have your Baby? wait that'll just scare you... ok how about You're really good at this I love your work!
Date: 01/13/09 09:44 pm Title: Chapter 5
Beautiful, simply beautiful.
Date: 01/13/09 09:41 pm Title: Chapter 4
*The Hallelujah Chorus begins* The heavens open and there is a light. Don't run from it. Go, go into the bright future you may have together. don't die without at least bbeing able to say "We tried."
Date: 01/13/09 09:36 pm Title: Chapter 3
Thank you honey. I really wanted them together in the end. Even if they just give it a chance now that he's matured a bit, I'll be happy.
Date: 01/13/09 09:30 pm Title: Chapter 2
HOLY CHRIST ON A CRACKER! YES!!! THis is good
Date: 01/13/09 09:28 pm Title: Chapter 1
OMG I LOVE YOU!!!! I LOVE YOU!! THANK YOU!!! *bows at feet* THANK YOU!
Date: 01/13/09 07:29 pm Title: Chapter 8
aw .... bill! bill! bill!!
so personal picks for the boys names? i know its rather like pestering but i just want to know what YOU picked? :D
Date: 01/13/09 07:28 pm Title: Chapter 8
Oh my God. I thought he was going to leave for sure! I detest cliff hangers, but I'm glad you do too. Keep writing! =D
Date: 01/13/09 07:22 pm Title: Chapter 8
ahhhh you had me worried there 4 a minute