Date: 08/31/08 01:26 pm Title: The morning after
This feels like a totally unrelated chapter to the previous one. I thought Tom was running but then he was there the next day so there was no point in switching hotel rooms. Also Bill's reactions felt strange to me. He was too normal. I know people who have been raped try to act normal but this was too calm. There should have been some little ticks, other than his thoughts to give away how upset/freaked he was.
Also it wasn't a creepy normal. It was just a normal normal. Do you know what I mean? Or am I speaking another language?
On the other hand I'm glad you made Bill's feelings for Tom clear. You went a little overboard, you could probably just have focused on Bill desperately seeking Tom for comfort but whatever.
I'm assuming Bill won't be able to hear Tom's words if he's under water but I think a confession is in order. Or at least a session of Bill telling Tom what he thinks will be a terrible supprise.
Author's Response: I totally understand what you are saying, but I have the all story already figured out in my mind so I usually do things my way and maybe you’ll understand were I’m going at the next chapter or so. Thank you for your review, I really liked it! ^,^
Date: 08/31/08 12:21 pm Title: The morning after
OMG OMG is Bill drownding!! TOMM SAVE HIM!! AHHH cant wait for more!!
No wonder why Bill enjoyied it..it was Tom.
Author's Response: Thank you for your Review ^^
Date: 08/24/08 01:34 am Title: The dawn after
Interesting... what's going to happen next? :)
Author's Response: you will see it very soon I promise. I'm working on it!
Date: 08/19/08 09:50 pm Title: The dawn after
why dont you make another chapter please??i wanna know what happens with bill=DDD
Author's Response: I will, it's already on the way!rn Thanks ^,^
Date: 08/19/08 04:32 pm Title: The dawn after
Damn, i kinda had a feeling it was Tom.
Seriously though Tom should feel ashamed..
Author's Response: he his a bit but he's more in a mood to kill himself but first he has to wake up and think about what he'll do, then he'll decid. ^.^
Date: 08/19/08 02:22 pm Title: The dawn after
this is good
please continues!!
Author's Response: thank you I will ^,^
Date: 08/19/08 02:15 pm Title: The dawn after
Woah!!
I Love it,
please go on...
^_^
Author's Response: Thank you ^,^
rn I willrn
Date: 08/19/08 01:35 pm Title: The dawn after
The ending's fine as long as Bill finds him asap. It may have been rape but Bill still enjoyed it to a certain degree. And I'm assuming he wouldn't want to lose his twin. Bill doesn't even know it was Tom. He might be able to get the receptionist to help him right?
Saki knows what he did doesn't he?
Author's Response: well, all of that his going to be explained sooner or later! so stay tooned to find out! (don't mind me) ^o^ I'm not shure if Saki knows he raped him, I think that Saki thinks they made love. ^.^rn Thanks for the review. :*
Date: 08/19/08 01:33 pm Title: The dawn after
I'm glad you're turning this into a fic!
Careful with the mistakes, there were lots of them :S
Update soon :D
Author's Response: thank you!rnrn
I'm sorry about the mistakes, I'm going to read the story and if i find them, I'll correct it. Thak you! ^^
Date: 08/18/08 03:42 pm Title: The raping
yes, continue it's to good and suspensful to stop now!
Author's Response: I might write another chapter (I'm actually too lazy to wrte now!) HiHi! :P but I'll do it any dayrnthank you ^,^
Date: 08/11/08 06:20 am Title: The raping
hihihi this is really cute!
Author's Response: thank you ^,^
Date: 07/28/08 09:12 pm Title: The raping
lmao that was funny!!!!!
tom the rapsit lol lol!!!!!
that was a good one shot!!=DDDD
Author's Response: i'm very glad you like it ^,^
Date: 07/28/08 08:15 pm Title: The raping
This was really hot, but you should write another chapter about them waking up together and Tom telling Bill he loves him, yada yada yada. Bill might have liked how it felt, but there will always be the morning after. Just my thoughs, take em or leave em.
Author's Response: i don't know when i'll have the time to write another chapter about this, I'm going camping next week so i will be very busy. maybe if i find the inspiration i'll write some other thing for this story.
Date: 07/28/08 07:51 pm Title: The raping
Ahahahahahahahahahahah
I LOVE SAKIIIIIII!!!!!!!!
man I love youuuuuuu!!!!!!!!
Author's Response: I'm glade you liked it! ^,^
Date: 07/28/08 06:52 pm Title: The raping
i dont get it
Author's Response: okay, honey, the story is like this:
Bill get's inside his hotel room, he get's raped, he likes it, and outside Bill's hotel room is Saki and a new security guard, and then his when you know that the guy that raped Bill his Tom, that's why if the security guard went inside the hotel room, tom woul kill the guy! got it?rn
hope you understand now and reread the story! ^^
Date: 07/28/08 06:33 pm Title: The raping
Wow. This story was priceless to me when I found out it was Tom. Make another with the 2 G's, eh?
Author's Response: i have already made one with the G's but now i got this new idea for a story but i have to write it first.rni also have a big story of the G's but it's written by hand and not finish, so I'm full of work, i should really start writting ^,^rn I'm glad u liked the story!
Date: 07/28/08 04:30 pm Title: The raping
*chuckles* it was tom!!! i love saki, i really do.
Author's Response: hihi, thank you, i like saki two! i don't know what crossed my mind to inclued him, but since he HIS a security i didn't felt the need to invent a name ^,^ thank you (again ^,^ )
Date: 07/28/08 03:27 pm Title: The raping
Was it Tom who raped Bill?
Great oneshot btw
Author's Response: yes it was our dear Tom, if he was drunk i do not know, but I'm sure if he were to be drunk, saki would not allow him to go to his brother
thank you! ^,^
*sorry for the writting, i was in a stupid inspired moment* ^x^
Date: 07/28/08 02:57 pm Title: The raping
mmm!
fucking amazing.
perfect :))
Author's Response: ^o^ thank so much *v*
Date: 07/28/08 02:33 pm Title: The raping
Hahaha!
Nice story! :)
Though i understood it was Tom when the description of the story says that Tom was in the story...
That's what kinda destroy pieces of a story...
Anyways, it was great! :D
Author's Response: thank you, and i understand what you mean, but still i had to putt it. but tank u! ^,^