oh wow, this bill just blows my mind, he's really...intense! lol

It's pretty darn sad when a mother refuses to believe that her teenage son has REAL friends. Well, in Bill's case, A real friend. But I loved reading her reaction to the discovery that Tom is, in fact, a live person, lol.

Haha, wow. That was great :)

Okay, okay. I really have to control myself and NOT go on to Chapter 7 until I review Chapter 6. I can do it. I have that much self control, right?

...right. Of course I do.

So, first of all, I'm really starting to enjoy Tom's POV for a different reason altogether - not because he's "normal" and not because his thought processes are rather mundane, but because I can take another look at Bill through his eyes. It's a completely different experience than having to categorize Bill by what he's thinking, and though I can relate to both of them on different levels (right, Bill's level is labeled "crazy") and I enjoy Bill's theories a whole lot, I'm really, really glad you guys decided to do the alternate POV. It makes the story a lot more 3-dimensional that way, you know? I don't get to see all sides of it, which is where the mystery comes in, but I get to see the sides that move the story along, because it's not about *just* Bill, it's about Bill and Tom.

And I like this way more than the classic omniscient because not only am I enjoying the show from the seat I get in both of their brains, but I'm also taking a part in it. It's an experience, it really is. :3

I loved the similarities you showed us between Bill and Tom again. Before I'd thought that Tom was a loner by choice and I see that that's partially true, but lines like "Tom would have understood if Bill was too afraid to hang around him anymore." and "Tom had learned from experience that parents didn't usually like unexpected guests, especially unexpected guests that looked like he did." make me think he's been just as cast out of society (so to speak) as Bill has. I'm torn between deciding whose situation is more painful - Tom's seems to be a necessity almost, and it certainly isn't his fault that he has to live this way, but then again, Bill's isn't exactly a *choice* either. You can't help who you are, and I think that's another similarity - on the surface it seems like Bill accepts that and can cheerfully tell the world to go fuck itself, but there are moments where I see that he really wants everyone to believe him more than anything else. And Tom is constantly worried about making an impression, even though he acts like he couldn't care.

Okay, um, so deep character analysis aside. :3 (And I LOVE gmail for saving my draft every 10 seconds because I've developed somewhat of a phobia of having everything deleted again. D: )

Oh god, the gnomes. And oh god, Tom's reaction to the gnomes. I loled when he said he thought he saw one move, I really did. And it made me feel all fuzzy and warm inside because he knows *just* how to handle Bill, even this early in the game. Heheheh, they're both so cute.

And oooh! I loved the guitar part of it! I love it when stories incorporate parts of the twin's real lives even if its so blatantly AU and I *loved* that you showed Tom's affinity to the guitar, and even more that you mentioned Bill shutting up and listening to it for a bit. That was the sweetest scene. *squirms* I hope you add in Bill's love and talent for singing too, though knowing him it could end up something wocky, like him practicing the war-cry for the buttercup-fairies or something.

AND. I love relationship development, and while I usually prefer it to be subtle, I liked that you made it fairly obvious in this chapter because... because, well, Bill couldn't be subtle if his life depended on it. ;3 So the leaving behind the notebook, and asking Tom questions that didn't have anything to do with "analyzing" him - I thought you played that out very well.

And Simone's reaction, lol. I was a little surprised at first but I don't know why because if Bill was my kid and hadn't had a friend over since the 4th grade (i wonder about that, btw, who WAS that poor unfortunate soul?!) I wouldn't have believed him either. And I love that Tom feels sympathy for the poor woman cause that just helps me seep into him more. ...hmm. Seep into him. Not the best choice of words, I sound like some kind of ooze...

ANYWAY. There are a dozen more things to analyze but I really can't bring myself to it because chapter 7 is BEGGING ME (on its hands and knees, REALLY!) to read it and who am I to deny? D:

Oh and before I forget, thank you. :3 For letting me read early I mean, I think I had a slower, more enjoyable experience knowing there was another chapter waiting for me too. *squirms* Till the next!!

Much love,

Ella

ooOOoo...the plot thickens! I'm so loving this story so far. I like how you don't go too over-the-top when you guys are narrating from Bill's POV. The stuff he thinks is so out there, it makes it seem even more bizarre when his "tone" is so normal and matter-of-fact.

I'm loving it more and more

btw, the diary page was pure genius! lol

SO EXCELLENT. But if I was Bill, these conditions would have only fueled my belief that Tom was an alien.

So I love how much of a humongous BITCH my computer is and how it deleted my review RIGHT before I was going to type my name and press submit. For a few moments I thought of letting out a scream of abject horror, destroying something beautiful, and forgetting this review business altogether, but then I saw "He was going to have a friend over!" and though, god, Bill. Why must you be so effing cute, huh? WHY?! ...and I realized that I *had* to review again because I loved his chapter too much not to. Also, did I mention Bill was really, really cute? Because if I didn't, beg pardon - Bill was really, really cute. Which brings me to my point:

Froggy, you are such a huge liar that you have transcended the realm of normal type liars and found another to lie to people in!! DD:

Bill was so damn adorable in this chapter, I can't contain myself, so I'm just going to start with him. The line, "His mystery would be solved and he'd finally be able to prove to everyone that he wasn't crazy." broke my heart, it really did. Especially because he noted just before that that going in might lead to death. D: Bill's reactions in the past chapters made me sort of... comfortable with how everyone treated him, mainly because he didn't seem to mind all that much, you know? He brushed off everyone's weird glances and insults and the like and while I was "in" his head so to speak I did the same without pausing to look at the situation realistically, because, realistically speaking, who wouldn't be hurt by that? And that line cinched it for me and while before, I was amused by his "theories" now I really feel just, pissed off on his part and I WANT them to be real just so he can rub it in everyone's face while I go "Suckers." from the sidelines. (Mrs. Moore, I am SO onto you.)

I know I go on and on about it in every review but I really can't get over your attention to detail. At this point I'm not even sure it can be called that because it's been incorporated into *everything* so much so that it seems like the words just come out of you like that. Like the part where Bill asked Tom where he buried the shoes in "what he hoped sounded like casual conversation" when in the next line it was revealed that he'd asked Tom the same thing every single day. What's so extraordinary about that, you ask? Well, just that you were deep enough in Bill's head to know that only *he* would still make it an attempt at casual when in fact it had become a regular sort of questioning. There are many, many other lines like that in each chapter and remember when I said it had become so natural to follow along Bill's thoughts? That's why.

Oh and the shoes mystery is seriously driving me OFF THE WALLS!!!! Just so you know.

I was very pleasantly surprised at how much information you gave us this chapter, especially since the previous ones have been frustratingly vague (regarding Tom anyway) so when the warehouse scene arrived not only was I going "Bill. Don't do it. Don't, don-- DAMNIT, BILL. WHAT DID I *JUST* SAY?!" some part of me was also rubbing her hands together and cackling in glee because I thought I'd *finally* get to see what was up with Tom.

...and I did, but it was definitely not what I was expecting. I had thought that Tom must've had some sort of guardian, but I hadn't expected his father (Jorg? D: ) to be so... well, so fatherly. *scratches head* I kind of went "huh?" right along with Bill when they were arguing over homework - I was waiting for the abuse and all I got was "I want you to get an education."

It was a surprise, but not an unwelcome one. It was kind of refreshing, actually, and made me feel a bit better about Tom's situation that he at least has some sort of family to rely on, even if he doesn't have food or much of anything else. Of course I could be jumping the gun on the no-abuse thing here, but I don't think that's the direction you'll be taking. And, of course, for every question that got answered, you forced me to ask at least a dozen more. In fact, the questions I'm asking are pretty much the ones Bill is asking. D: And when it's Tom's POV, I wonder about Bill's freakishness right along with him. It's kind of a surreal experience, I don't think I've ever gotten this... involved in a character before. You guys really are doing an amazing job, I feel like I could carry on either one of their thoughts now. ...which is more than a little creepy.

I can't decide if I'm more worried about what sort of *creature* Tom is or about what Tom's life is like and why, but I love Bill's enthusiasm at having a friend. A friend, not a "creature" he can investigate, but someone he can talk to, get close to, sex up... umm....uh. Yeah. Moving on.

I really want the next chapter, and I want it now. Right now. Especially since I know you two have finished writing it and are only withholding it from me to fulfill your evil, sadistic desires. I'm dying of curiosity of who the "they" is (CPA? cops? angry landowners? PMSing werewolves?! WHO KNOWS?! ...wait... YOU do! D: Stop rubbing it in my face, would you?)

So remember how I said at least this review would be more coherent, muffin... yeah, I lied. I swear I had more insightful, deep stuff written in the other one, but my brain is spinning in little figure eights right now so I can barely remember half of it. I hope you got at least the jist of what I was trying to say though, mainly being 'I loved it and want more.'

Mopingly yours,

Ella

*sighs and pets Bill* I want to know what's going on with Tom and his father, and I want Tom and Bill to be friends. Bill really needs a friend. *sob* Gah. This fic gets me mushy.

=D
thats bill for ya.
great chapter