Thank you for getting your priorities straight and actually listening to the demands of your groupies. You would have had a full blown revolt on your hands if you neglected us. I was working on the banners.

Now to the story...I am loving the tentative gayness...they are both so deep in denial. Gold nail polish on his toes? Might as well tattoo a rainbow on his ass.

Now please donate your sperm so i can have pretty and clever children.

Author's Response:

PUT THOSE BANNER SKILLS TO GOOD USE I still have naked stories tyvm

That was an awesome chapter! Bill's a virgin? And they're finally bonding for realz!! Who saw that coming? The parts with Tom's parents were touching. This was the best chapter ever! You have filled my heart with love.

Author's Response:

Bill is a virgin because everyone's afraid he'll go praying mantis and kill them after

My mom fucking IS kool-aid, K?

the more i read the more i love your story !

Author's Response:

Thanks a jillion and 3/4 sugarbutt! <3

this chapter was Bill's most elegant moment. aww.
love the end notes. glad you can still update.

Author's Response:

Most elegant moment! That's a new one, thanks!

``Yub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the grub, yay God`` Best. Thing. Ever. Omg I kinda embarrassed myself laughing out loud at that one in the bus but who cares! XD

Oh and so happy to see a new chapter, this fic is totally awesome and hilarious and I enjoy it immensely! Can’t wait to read more =D

Author's Response:

Jumbie-kins! :D Whenever I see your name now, I think of twins on jetskis. AWESOME.

wow! 7 kinds of awesome?

Author's Response:

I KNOW. I thought it would be at least ten, but Tom's probably just playing coy.

w00t! wasn’t expecting to see this updated for a while. I like nice surprises. :D

sorry, mostly babbling this time even though it’s quite long.

"What did they do, a half stitch?" Bill grunted, not stopping. "Feels like a half stitch."
I was literally thinking “HAHA, HE IS GOING TO SAY HE’D RATHER REDO IT HIMSELF NEXT.” and then he did. awes. :Db

"Or you'll order a pizza? What?"
XDD love the banter bb

NAYFUN’S OILED-UP WALRUS TONGUE IS HOT. (yeah, I’ll settle for the tongue.)

I don't find princesses fucked up behind dumpsters."
"Have you looked at the Royal Family lately?"
gah, idk which royal family you’re referring to, but I’d deffo say that you could find UK’s prince harry in compromising positions. or maybe people wouldn’t really recognise him if he was wearing a traffic cone, but whatevs. plus, I have a childhood friend who is like a skinny, smart version of him, who could give harry a bad rep by… idk, PASSING EXAMS? TALK TO PEOPLE USING LONG WORDS?

I WANT TO RENAME EVERY ONLINE ACCOUNT I HAVE TO ‘PEABILL’.

I really like the idea of make-up as pretty war paint b/c everyone really does walk around with a protective shield up, be it physical or otherwise.

"That thing, where you smile when you don't want to."
oh darling, I love how you say the cheesy disney stuff in a gruff way. ;) BE TRUE TO YOUR HEART, THAT’S WHEN THE HEAVENS WILL PART AND BABY SHOWER YOU WITH MY LOOOOVE.

Can't barf if you're smiling.
see, I was going to say that this will be useful information, but really, I have only ever barfed when I’ve had the stomach flu, and then you kind of want to get the crap *out*. gag reflex? what gag reflex? to my great pre-teen angst I realised early on that I was never going to be able to puke on demand (I was a ridiculously stupid kid and wanted to impress my brother). but at least I have teeth.

*SQUEE* AND *FLAIL* OVER BILL’S AWKWARDNESS ABOUT BEING A VIRGIN.

I hope it was sarcasm, b/c hating on motorcycles? not cool, man. :P I mean, whenever I get on one I never know if the next minute will be my last BUT I HAVE WORKED HARD ON LEARNING TO DRIVE THOSE THINGS, HMMKAY. but partly I think the thoughts of impending doom have their base in the fact that my dad had me taking two turns around the block on a small motorbike, just so I’d figure out how to work the thing, then I got this HUGE MONSTER WITH A CRAPPY SEAT and was basically kicked into traffic. TERRIFYING, OMG. BUT DON’T HATE ON THE BIKES.

DFSJKLHFDGJKHSFJKHSJSD BED!SHARING. OH YOU GORGEOUS THING.

more fuzzy and soft, cute. In a manly way.
this is such a brain-twin moment idk if we might be connected to the same cosmic source of awesome (like in avatar, but without the freaky tentacle hair. IDK ABOUT YOU BUT LAST TIME I CHECKED – NO TENTACLES IN MY HAIR. well, okay, there was one, but that belonged to a potato.) anyway, AWESOME. perfect snarky style, which is how I like narrators.

Tom tried to understand the mind of an adult who could look at him, this boy curled up asleep, and drag him out of bed... hit him, tell him they didn't want him.
THE HEART, IT WIBBLES.

rofl at gordon calling for simone almost right away, like “OMG, SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THE KID, ARE YOU SURE HE’S NOT PART OCTOPUS???” but I loved the whole scene, because it shows the importance of appreciation of the things which we take for granted.

They want to meet you, for whatever unfathomable reason. I don't want to meet you, yet every morning, like clockwork-
bwahahahahahahaha *cackle*

hapless. word love. it’s brilliant every time I read a word I had forgot that I know. it’s kind of bad though when I reread my old fic and come across words which I have forgot the meaning of. :/

"Say it or I'll draw hairy dicks on your cast. 'I am awesome and everyone will love me'."
hah, funsies :Db this line stuck with me so bad that when we find out later that bill’s cast is black I thought “was he going to draw it with tipp-ex?”

it’s great the way tom interacts with his parents, and how he is a bit like a buffer for bill’s adorable awkwardness.

"Your funeral."
your funeral as in ‘I will play at your funeral’, or your funeral as in ‘I’m so crap that you will have a seizure and DIE’? or both, it works.

the invisible tennis ball technique will have to be tested… tomorrow, possibly.

"Don't act like you're a nice person,"
*CACKLECACKLESNORTLOL*

Buttface is eight words
think you mean letters, bb. and I am not as polite as your bill here, because surely he wouldn’t have pointed it out. :P

"Oh whatever," Tom denied. "He's nowhere near as good-looking as me."
"Don't be ridiculous, he's gorgeous," Simone said, and Bill flushed clear up to the tips of his ears.
TEEHEE. XDDDDD

Bill tried very hard not to be bitterly jealous.
But when the green tinge started spreading over his skin he realised in horror that he had been unsuccessful, and excusing himself he slipped out of his seat to prance lionesque out through the french windows before he turned into the hulk and ruined his pretty, pretty outfit. Although the original hulk had anger as his trigger.

You're one of my best friends. You're a part of my life, whether you like it or not. I like you. I like spending time with you. I think you're at least seven different kinds of awesome. You're the only one that doesn't see that.
d’awwwwwww. :3b

"I really like you, too," he said smally. "You're my best friend."
AWWWWWWW. cuter, b/c bill hasn’t been subscribing to disney talk before.

His shirt was worn soft, and Bill was warm beneath it; pressed close, Tom could feel the barely discernable curve of solid muscle there.
Just that touch made something unwind in Tom's chest. Some part of him felt more at ease, satisfied, with the contact, feeling Bill warm and close and real by him, and Tom sighed, letting his hand linger and his eyes close.
and, um, yeah. just. perfection. much love. sfdjkhsdggdfjhgsdfgd

you’re doing awesomely with the development of the relationship between tom and bill (I was a little bit apprehensive you might let the whole thing go splat after bill’s catharsis, but again you stun me with your wit and talent), and I DO LOVE THE SNARK, I DO. you’re also subtly pointing out bill’s weaknesses in short one-liners scattered across the text, which is very effective in reminding the reader of bill’s insecurities and difficulties in trusting people (the thing about not wanting to let go of the family even if he might have to? DDDDDDD: *WIBBLE*)

WHAT IS THIS ABOUT CRYING? :P

denglish is clearly the language of the gods. and I am going to start saying grace now just so I can say “ Yub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the grub, yay God.”

music recs? THAT WOULD REQUIRE THINKING, WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR? :P jk, I’m just better at spamming people with what I’m listening to at the moment (which is mostly th tbh, so. >.>)

don’t kill yourself getting chapters out, for srs. people need to learn to be more patient (I hear it's a virtue. whatever one needs virtues for).

Author's Response:

I fucking LOVE your reviews. They are always so long and thorough and hilarious, which... actually describes the last time I had sex BUT MOVING ON

Oh my god, you updated!!!! Does this mean you're gonna forget the whole not updating CC as often thing, or is this just some sick joke? lol

Awwwww Bill's a virgin and he's never been kissed!! It's pretty damn perfect, Tom will be his first everything! =D Boy, you're killing me here. I love that they are getting closer, but damnnnn slash it up a bit faster hahah

Okay so listen this chapter was freaking hilarious. I love the Tom-Bill playful banter, you write the greatest conversations. You always have me laughing so hard, like I have so much going on and i'm so stressed out, but when you update and I get to read the new chapter, it literally makes my day.

And aw Tom, going home just to tell your parents how much you love them and how thankful you are. Bill is totally rubbing off on him (Tho I do wish it was a bit more literal! lol)

It was so cute how Bill was so nervous to meet Tom's parents. And he's so silly they obviously love him and he still can't get that.

So yeah, you're still pretty damn awesome and I love you to pieces and I think you are a literary genius!

p.s. so should we exchange rings or something? seeing as we're engaged of sorts heehee

p.p.s. sorry for the kind of short, crappy review, but i'm so tired. Next chapter I'll leave you a better review ;)

Author's Response:

SICK JOKE, HAHA

Ok. I was supposed to review 2 chapters ago, but the fact that Bill was beat up has left me angrily ranting. I was not going to regale you with nonsensical babble, so I left it alone. Knowing now why Bill is...er, well...Bill, has left my heart crying out for him, and clenching in utter sadness for all he went through. There really are people who just aren't supposed to breed...yet they do. Tom is a marvel! I don't know what kind of dumbassery shenanigans he pulled, but you can tell how much he's grown and knows to appreciate everything he has been blessed with. I feel like a proud mama! If I had a daughter, that's the kind of man I would want her to marry. Heck!! That's the man I want to marry!!

You already know I love their banter, and I love that you always deliver!

Author's Response:

Hahaha, sorry about that, but he's on the mend now, in more ways than one!