Date: 04/24/10 08:47 pm Title: Chapter 5
I didn't review this, did I? I do it now then...
I'm starting to get out of words. The skill of yours to write mewntally distorted, sick people amazes me. I'll take back my earlier statements. I don't think you should write any longer chapters. In shortnes, in little moments and scenes is the power of your fic. I prefer them actually. Keep it this way.
Also I wanted to say that you use very wisely italics, bolds and other effects like short paragraphs. I feel the desperation of Bill's condition. The helpless feeling when not knowing what to do. Good job once again.
Date: 04/23/10 04:03 am Title: Chapter 5
Great chapter with what was going on with it. I love all the complications that arise as the story progresses. One little piece of advice though- each time a different character speaks, even if it's one word, you need to put it in a new paragraph. Otherwise the dialogue becomes too difficult to read. Otherwise keep up the great work. I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
Date: 04/23/10 12:59 am Title: Chapter 5
-love-
idk what else to say 'sides love so...
-LOVE-
Date: 04/22/10 04:15 am Title: Chapter 4
Don't be too sorry for these being short. Even if I wish to read more and more and mre, your chapters are so full of emotions that it's always enough to chew and swallow.
Once again an interesting chapter. Bill's need and fear of closeness was quite devastating. I'm not even sure, how sick it was. More like real, realistic view for his life. I always wonder if this is how he sees the crowd, the other people.
I liked the sentence - The camera flashed again. We all signed her shirt and the girl left again. No phone number, no name. Just another fan, lost in the crowd. - a lot! It leaves you numb, empty, slapped on a face by reality.
And Bill's cutting is hard for me to read since I always feel slightly nauseous, but I can handle it. I'm just over sensitive with these :).
I hope you'd give us Tom's POV again, because I personally love to read mentally ill Tom so much. I'm sure you will again in a future :)
Date: 04/22/10 12:24 am Title: Chapter 4
-love- TY FOR TYING ME!!
you made my daay!!
another thing crossed off my bucket list!
Date: 04/21/10 10:48 pm Title: Chapter 4
Another great chapter! Not as exciting as the last one but it still kept my attention and your writing style and skills make up for any lack of crazy drama. I love the feelings you put into Bills self harming. And once again I'm looking forward to another chapter!!
Date: 04/21/10 08:41 pm Title: Chapter 4
wow....i know how bill feels about the water though
Date: 04/21/10 04:05 pm Title: Chapter 3
I'm going to repeat the lasyt review: I adore the way you write their illness and the way you use different POV's. Georg's is probably the most interesting since his is the outsider's view. I know you asked for advice, but I can't give you any, I guess. Just that don't be too afraid of long paragraphs. Sometimes they fit, they challenge and make a great contrast on one word or sentence -paragraphts. This deserves definitely more attention, but I guess this is not the easiest ficf to catch since it's most like tiny nuancies on twins moods and the struggles instead of actual things hapening.
But I enjoy, very much!
Date: 04/21/10 03:51 pm Title: Chapter 2
I adore the way you write bi-polar twins. Their mental problems, illness, is both heartaching and extremely interesting. It's also somehow feeling real, possible. I wonder what kind of background you have on a knowledge of mental illness, because their symphtoms are pretty realistic to me. I also like the way you write twins as brothers since you managed to capture their closeness without turning it into twc (since this is gen, right?). That's always a tricky part for me.
I think it's a good choise to post two chapters at once everytime... and it still leaves me to crave for more :D. Now to the next chapter...
Date: 04/21/10 07:08 am Title: Chapter 3
oh my goooood. This is breaking my heart. I LOVE IT! :3 tehee, did you get "Bright lights & black holes" from "Bright Lights" by Placebo? XD
Author's Response: yep :D
Date: 04/21/10 12:27 am Title: Chapter 3
Wow that was a great chapter update!! You transition nicely between tenses and characters and the flashback worked so well for the story. The length was really good and the diary page image was a nice touch. I'm definitely looking forward to the next chapter!!!
Date: 04/20/10 03:45 pm Title: Chapter 3
Hihi! Love this.
Quick question: Did you draw that picture of Bill in the journal?
Author's Response: the one with the red cross?rni did that one, yes :)rnthe girl with the wings is not mine, though :D
Date: 04/20/10 03:29 pm Title: Chapter 3
Hihi! Love this.
Quick question: Did you draw that picture of Bill in the journal?
Date: 04/20/10 02:20 pm Title: Chapter 3
wow i love that you included a page from the notebook you should totally do that again makes it more intresting to read and helps to understand bill more
Date: 04/19/10 03:15 pm Title: Chapter 2
Wow I love this fanfic its one of my favorites its so beliveable
Date: 04/19/10 12:11 pm Title: Chapter 2
Wow I love this fanfic its one of my favorites its so beliveable
Date: 04/19/10 07:21 am Title: Chapter 1
This sounds interesting. Especially when I do my own little psychoanalyzing on our twins, so even if I know this is a fiction, it's still interesting to see how you'll approach it. I don't usually read anything outside slash, but I'll definitely give this a change. Nice job!
Date: 04/19/10 05:38 am Title: Chapter 1
Hm, I really like this despite the fact that there's no pairing, which is a first. I really like the idea of manic-depressive disorder. I think I'm going to look more into that :)
Date: 04/19/10 03:07 am Title: Chapter 1
This is actually really good. It's nicely written and an interesting plot. The only issue I have is the length- it's definitely a bit on the short side... Otherwise keep up the good work!