HALLO KLEINER ANDROID.

So I think you need a little encouragement and I am the perfect person for that, because not only do you need little, but this chapter has moved me to give it to you.

FIRSTLY, I have no idea what you were freaking out about, except I kind of do and I'm lying, because this chapter was soft and sweet and fresh and wonderful (but I do get the panic, as we already spoke of). You did good, I promise, I'm not disappointed at all. And I have high expectations for you.

This chapter definitely kicked the chemistry up between them a few notches, but not the physical chemistry - which you already dealt with skillfully in the first chapters, and by skillfully I mean you confused my hormones into thinking I was reading the dirtiest fyredancer smut when they were just dancing - but the whole aspect of why people form relationships and stay together, because merely the physical won't hold two people together. I think one of the best demonstrations of this was Tom's little trick on Bill, pretending to be bad at skating so he could get close.

I also think the moment of confusion over their hairstyles - where Bill needed to confirm that he can commit too, and all the ending paragraphs were really fabulous; the literary equivalent of the straightaway on a racetrack where the car really amps up their speed.

There were two small things I noticed with this chapter that I do myself, and they're not bad things so much as a good thing that there could be too much of. So I speak of this only because I'm expecting you to be tough with my writing as well, and I think we have really similar mental universes for our characters.

One of the things I've learned from analysing the writing of my favourite authors is that I don't need to write about everything. There can be jumps in the action and timeline even beyond the regular. For instance, you jumped the two week gap quite fine, with the minor description of the text messages and other such things, but I think perhaps some small parts of certain scenes could be cut; sort of like, it's okay to not describe some events or actions in detail, otherwise every event starts to hold about the same weight and it can be hard to build the tension up again for more significant moments.

The other thing is relying on dialogue - I don't think this is actually a problem for you, because you had almost no dialogue for the first few chapters and you were so wonderful with the actions of the characters. For instance, in the last two chapters, there have been several large blocks of dialogue describing Tomas and Bill's life between the two. I would almost love to see some more action used to tell their stories. Maybe Bill watching Tom interact with his sister or his family, the overwhelming Spanish presence telling us what it was like for Tom.

Other than that, I can just feel the momentum building up and I know you have something fabulous in store. I would love for more incorporation of the German environment, Tomas' Spanish background, and I cannot wait for our return to Kinetic. I feel like the club is almost like a third character that you've shaped and molded in your mind, like you know hundreds of details that'll never need to show up in the story, but builds it into this huge atmosphere for all the characters to interact with; it just has so much weight in the story. Don't be afraid to use your vivid imagination and intense visual descriptions to manipulate the mood of the story, because you are so so so good at it.

Also, usually I'm a nervous wreck with stories because I can suss out all the different opportunities for conflict, and with yours I have no idea where the conflict is going to come from. I feel like it's going to hit me like a punch from behind, and I'm really excited to see how this pushes the characters. (Usually I spend half a review just rambling about the conflicts and issues and I have NOOO idea, you haven't dropped huge angsty hints anywhere, GUH.)

Have a great CLC trip; you really pushed yourself and earned it by finishing this chapter, because I know it was so tough for you and it came out wonderfully, it's one of my favourite chapters yet! (The most favourite being the one where Bill is tipped back on the stool. I will never get over that.)

Author's Response: Ahhh, how did I never respond to this? I AM CONFUSED. But this review has, once again, made me grin like the biggest of idiots. I love your reviews so much. *____*

I'm so glad that you saw what I was getting at with this chapter, though, and ahh! You compared it to fyredancer's stuff, that's like, the biggest compliment in existence. Wow!

I'm so glad that you caught on to the meaning behind Bill having to confirm his ability to commit, that really makes me smile, because I was so proud of myself with that part.

I agree; I was reading through this chapter, and felt like I did write waaay too much. I'm probably going to go back and cut some parts out after I read through it again. I was going to do it for fear of it getting boring, but that's a good point; I never thought about the fact that every event would hold the same weight after a while. Thank you very much for pointing that out! Never ever be afraid to point out things that you have thoughts on, because you know I'll never get upset, and that I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. <3

Using more action to tell their stories is also a good suggestion, and I will definitely be keeping that in mind as I write! I'm always worried that I'm using too much dialogue--too much tell, and not enough show, so to speak--so I will definitely remember this!

We'll see more of Tomas' Spanish background starting with the very next chapter--I have things planned. ;)

Try not to be too nervous; the conflict is coming, but I don't think that it'll be the type of conflict that everyone is expecting, if they're expecting one at all. LOL I'm sorry! There hasn't been a need for angsty hints!

Also, the CLC trip was fantastic; I really enjoyed myself, thank you. =) I'm so glad that you enjoyed this chapter! I always squeal when I see a review from you, because I know it's going to be full of constructive criticism and analysis, and I do love reading your input. I don't think you know how much you've really helped me shape this story, even from the first review, because I always keep your advice in mind; you really push me to be a better writer, and I appreciate it so much! Thank you, bby! ♥

I still love it when Tomás speaks spanish :D

Author's Response: I'm glad! There's plenty more where that came from, believe you me. ;)

Yay! A solid date for an udate!
Such a sweet chapter i couldn't help but aww! ^w^

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! Thank you, dear!

Awwww that date was wonderful. I have to admit though I was thinking along the same lines as Bill. I know the club is Tom's stomping ground and his comfort zone but it's hard to relate the shy Tom as being one and the same. Not that that's a bad thing, don't get me wrong, I really like that it's slow and sweet.

I giggled at he vision of little Bill flying down a hill on skates into the canal!! And my heart went out to Tom, how lonely his childhood must have been.

And now I'm rambling *giggles* Sorry honey, I guess you can say I'm really happy you updated and that I loved it. Can't wait for more. *hugs*

Author's Response: I'm so glad you liked it! It's strange to think about Tomas as shy, especially because he's so confident in Kinetic, but it's true. =) It's just his nerves more than anything else, and to Tomas, Kinetic is his comfort zone, where he's protected by the safety of the low lights and his turntables, but in public, in order to impress Bill, he actually has to talk, and heaven forbid! XD

Hahaha, it's quite fun to imagine. I'm hoping that this has actually happened. I'm so holding hope that this comes out in an interview. ;) And yes, Tom's childhood was a lonely one. :( But at least he had the light of his life, Emmy to make things better. =)

Hey, I don't mind, I love reading what you have to say! Thanks so much for the review; you're so engaging, and it's always a pleasure to hear your thoughts. <3

Aw once again. I love it.
It's fluffing awesome ;)
I'm so curious how this's going to proceed.

Author's Response: I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Things are going to get very interesting in just a couple more chapters. ;)

Ahh! How friggin' adorable are they! I love this so much xD I seriously don't even know what to say right now.

Author's Response: I'm so glad you're enjoying it! Tomas and Bill are the apple of my eye, so I'm so pleased that you're enjoying them as well.

Damn! That was hott xD I love it =)

Author's Response: Hehe, I'm glad you enjoyed! Thanks, bby!

This is so sexy xD I really don't have anything to say. I'm speechless =)

Author's Response: Eee, thank you! =D

Wow! This is fantastic xD I think I smiled thru the whole thing while picturing it all happening. Amazing story, I absolutely love it!

Author's Response: I'm so loving your reviews, just so you know. They make me grin; I can feel your enthusiasm through the screen! =D Thank you so much. <3

AAWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!! SUPER CUTE!!! .... i dont mean this is a bad way what so ever, more in a buddy 'haha' kind of thing... but DAMN girl!! about time you updated!! my heart skipped a beat when i saw this on the recent lisT!!! THANK ROO!!

Author's Response: I'm so glad you liked it! And LOL, don't worry about it, I figured you meant it good naturedly. And omg, I knooooooow, I'm awful about updating ._. I was so stuck, but every other chapter that will be written, I already have planned out--from here on out, I have an outline to stick to and even if I veer from it, I know exactly where I want to take this fic, so updates will defintely be more constant, I promise! ♥