Date: 12/17/09 11:39 am Title: Chapter 2: Too Tired to Lift the Arms That Hold Onto the Stars
Gah, this is so sad. It's so visual and just...packed with so much emotion in every freaking scene. I don't usually read WIPs, so I hope you don't leave me hanging for too long. And the only thing I really have to point out in this one was a minor tense issue when Tom came in from the shower and Bill's watching TV. But really, this is awesome, and I'm anxious to read the rest of it! ♥ ♥
Author's Response: Aww, I'm sorry, I'm not really a fluff person, so whenever I write fluff, I have to start out with immense angst/sadness. I love that you think it's so visual and jam packed with emotion, because that's what i'm going for. Er, this is fairly short actually, and it's the xmas/winter fic that I have to finish before my vacation is up, so you guys get weekly updated for this ^_^. and thanks for the correction, I fixed it as soon as you pointed it out. I have tense issues, forever and always LOL. I have to work on that. But I'm really glad that you liked it, and I can't wait to post the next part ^_^
Date: 12/17/09 11:18 am Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
Oh my God, I love this. I kept reading, trying to figure out WHERE this was going. At first I was trying to figure out what happened to cause the fall-out between the boys, and then slowly that came together, and I still couldn't figure out where you were going with it, until the end. It's sad, and uncertain, and pretty heavy, but there's a promise of something better to come.
Author's Response: Awww, god, I'm glad you do. This fic is like my baby (other than my nano) so, like, this makes me happy (especially since I know that you like fluff and smut more). I get what you said about trying to figure out where it was going, I have a definative sense of how I want it to end, but I also know that I can't rush it, since my characters' feelings are so complex, so I just wanted to layer it at first, so that each subsequent chapter unfolds a layer, and when we reach the end, everything makes sense. I'm glad that it's working, that you can see that there's more to this other than the angsty backdrop, that's all I really wanted in this.
Date: 12/16/09 08:55 pm Title: Chapter 2: Too Tired to Lift the Arms That Hold Onto the Stars
I know this is your passion project right now, but this is the kind of story that I have a very difficult time reading unless it's set up a certain way, and that's a large share of my initial hesitance to read this, even with a promise of it getting better. I am the very opposite of an angst buff. Things don't need to be light and fluffy, but I have a lot of trouble reading stories like this.
Also, Tom's characterization is very difficult for me to sympathize with, and the story is from his POV so that makes it even harder. I wish you loads of inspiration to keep working on it and take it where you know it needs to go. :)
Author's Response: See, this is the type of review that I go for, because I try to appreciate and take into consideration everything you're saying. I wish I could understand what you meant by 'set up a certain way', primarily because starting things off, is generally my problem when it comes to writing anything, and I'm still trying to find ways to start things off that feel comfortable for both the reader and my self. And I get the thing about the angst buff, I'm a really cheerful person, but I find writing anything lighter difficult if it's not pure humor. That's something I've actually been trying to work on (and failing I guess).
As for sympathizing with Tom though, I think I'm going to have to go back and fix a couple things, because you're actually never meant to sympathize with him, and I don't want anyone to get the feeling that they're supposed to. I definitely don't sympathize with him, and in later chapters, he learns that he really has to stop expecting Bill to as well. I do thank you for all of the constructive crit. you gave me here though, because I'm going to keep everything in mind, and try my best to work it out, and make this better.
Date: 12/15/09 09:59 pm Title: Chapter 2: Too Tired to Lift the Arms That Hold Onto the Stars
I thoroughly enjoyed. This story is so unbearably touching and angst-filled,tender and well.....mature. Yeah that's the word. Please update soon:)
Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed this, honestly. I'm getting worried about this story b/c of the lack of reviews ;_;, but as long as you like it, I'll keep updating. And I love that you called it touching, tender and mature. (especially mature) this is the simplest fic I've EVER written, but I wanted it to be something worthwhile, something meaningful, not just a story about two people metting and falling in love, but a story about two people going through life screwing up & realizing they have to fix it, because truthfully, that's how life truly is. Anyways, I really am glad you liked it ^_^
Date: 12/15/09 05:01 pm Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
It's a sad face cause Bill makes me sad! :(
I wanna cuddle him and feed him cookies.
Author's Response: awwwws (am getting in trouble for typing this LOL) but, awwwwwz again *huggles* you can huggle him and feed him cookies, as long as they're christmas cookies
Date: 12/15/09 04:42 pm Title: Chapter 2: Too Tired to Lift the Arms That Hold Onto the Stars
;___;
Author's Response: what kind of review is this? ;_; no love. *goes back to show*
Date: 12/15/09 04:02 pm Title: Chapter 2: Too Tired to Lift the Arms That Hold Onto the Stars
Poor Bill. Tom is so so in denial. Bill shouldn't have to say he's sorry yet he has always been the emotional one. It pains me to see the twins like this even if it is only a story. I can't imagine them hating eachother at all. Although, I'm sure they don't really hate eachother here either. Tom must admit his feelings Bill is already too torn apart to do so. More soon yes?
Author's Response: Tom is just slow. like he's always slow, but in this it's like 10 times worse. And Bill will probably always say sorry. it's in his nature. he doesn't want to upset the balance, so he either bends & says sorry or runs away.
and I'm sorry it pains you to see the twins here. you're right, they don't hate each other, they hate their situation and tom THINKS he hates Bill at first b/c he feels abandoned. but bah, they'll be fine. and yes more, there's more up xD
Date: 12/15/09 03:48 pm Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
its sooo sad, i dont even know what to say. Good job
Author's Response: awww, thank you so much <333
Date: 12/06/09 06:58 pm Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
Gyuh.. I knew I shouldn't have started reading this story until you had it as "Complete".. I already want to read more! *headdesks*
Author's Response: LOL. Well there's another chapter up now, I'm being faithful to my updating schedule, since I'm on vacation for like two months. and this fic'll be over by then, so yea, I'm glad you like it so far though. I hope you enjoy the next chapter <3333
Date: 12/06/09 06:37 pm Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
At least it was angsty and sad start, but I'm curious to see, how you write older twins. They are normally written at their own age or younger, so it's refreshing to see them as adults. Very dramatic start anyways and I hope they'll work things out... :)
Author's Response: bah, everything I write seems to be angsty lately LOL. but I'm curious as well, I'm used to writing characters that are older than me, but not in this fandom, SO, it's an experience, and we'll see how I work it out ^_^
Date: 12/06/09 05:49 pm Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
...Tom, are you fucking KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?!
SDVJKDNVLKMDFNVLZDMBHILUJNV !!!!
Not impressed, Tom. Not at all. You're fucking LUCKY Bill actually DOES need you in his life to get through this, because he sure as hell threw your ass out of there and mummy made you be a man and take it.
SO FIX IT!
Author's Response: Tom's slow. we know this. he's gonna have to....work it out? lol. *huggles* they'll be fine.
Date: 12/06/09 12:51 pm Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
poor Bill. He's so sad and Tom is so not helping.I hope they can work things out. I really hope so.
Author's Response: bah Tom has issues. And don't worry, things'll be fine. thanks for reading and reviewing ^_^
Date: 12/06/09 05:46 am Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
I think a near-death experience will show Tom the light >.> I'll throttle him, if you want.
This is such a WONDERFUL fic to read after certain er...NON-FLOURISHED ones we could probably (not really) name >_< So um....update next week, ja?
Author's Response: LOL. maybe. you're free to try at least. xDDD
and HAHAHAH I'm glad you think it's better than that crap. I was trying HARD to break from from my own normal simplistic writing. xD and yes, update next week. yay for actual deadlines for this shit LOL
Date: 12/06/09 02:13 am Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
I enjoyed. Except this made me sad. Make it better!
Author's Response: aww i'm glad you enjoyed and i'm sorry for making you sad! i'll try to fix things somewhat in the next chapter
Date: 12/06/09 02:03 am Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
I enjoyed, xD
and call me emo but I happen to like reading angst, makes my life seem better, lol.
Author's Response: YAY for enjoyment <3
and nah it's not emo, it's just that you can appreciate someone else's struggle
Date: 12/06/09 01:59 am Title: Chapter 1: Stare Into the Sun, To See My Face For Once
I'm hooked....and that song was effin beautiful....
Author's Response: YAY I love hooking you guys! and i know right?? i love that song so much i'm addicted