Date: 01/09/10 06:17 pm Title: Chapter 8: Reality Check
Of course we are, you know it :)
Anyways, the crashlanding (kind of)... I knew it! I knew what Tom was about to do! That's why it is interesting to see that you chose to write it as a new begininning instead of the end of all. At least that's the way I see it now. A terrible price to pay, but still a possibility for a new life.
I'm not sure if you'vre read already, but I wanted to try this style of yours to one of my fics, but I must say that it's awfully difficult to build up a whole fic around it instead of a one chapter. But I liked it, so thank you for your inspiration :).
It's sad that this is coming to an end soon, but at the same time I hope it to end, because they are slowly taking new steps and I'm afraid them to crash again. I hope it doesn't happen... because after all, this looks like a fresh start and I love this Tom so much, I just noticed it :)
Author's Response: *grins* thank you love, your words make me smile immensely. And I'm glad that you figured out what Tom was about to do. i'd say that he's fairly predicable (and be right), but sometimes he has his moments (and merits).
And I haven't seen your fic, but I'd love to read it. To say I have you inspiration is lovely, but of course you should know that I simply want to read it because it's you. I'm going to have to look out for that. Oh and yea, it's hard to do an entire fic in one chapter (which is why I broke it up) But I have faith in you ^_^
And endings are generally sad, simply because you've become accustomed to something, even if it's hurtful, but you're right, this chapter of their lives ending is a blessing. oh and LOL I think you're perhaps the only person I know that loves Tom in this, but I'm glad to see it. He wasn't made out to be evil, just broken and hurt and as confused as Bill. ^_^
Date: 01/03/10 07:34 pm Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
cant wait for more!
Author's Response: ^_^
Date: 01/03/10 12:46 am Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
oh gawd...this story is intense I get goosebumps everytime I read it. ugh...I love this story!
I think I know where Tom went....oh shit D:
Author's Response: *blushes* awww, thank you love. I'm happy, truly happy, that you enjoy this so much. and O.O you probably do xD
Date: 01/02/10 11:06 pm Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
dude. i still dont get the writing style but i love it. its hard to get whats going on as well but i think i got it,
Author's Response: lol, there's nothing to really get. It's just a reflection of Bill's thoughts. This entire story is an inner monologue for him, all his thoughts piled into one single heap of words, and he has to try and single out the most important, thoughts, memories and facts. Because of this (and his addiction, and his over all emotional brokenness) his thoughts are disjointed. Most people don't think in full sentences, but his are disjointed even further than normal thoughts (and yet, still organized in a sort of weird way) because he's trying to tell a story, whether to himself or to Tom or the audience, only he knows. If you have an questions about what's going on, feel free to ask me for specifics love ^_^
Date: 01/02/10 08:55 pm Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
i hope this ends a little less depressingly. its an interesting format. i kind of like it, but only once in a great while. keep up the good work!
Author's Response: It will. The original ending was horrifyingly depressing, but my wife/lover/twin basically told me she'd withhold sex and love and cuddles if I ended it that way, so i revamped it for you guys ^_^
Date: 01/02/10 08:27 pm Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
You know.... I started to write a review of what I just read. Things like you were right and it's a mess and I'm afraid and curious of the explosion, but then I erased it all. I write, what metaphora I got in my mind while reading....
A rollercoaster.
The big ass rollercoaster, where you are so excited to get a ride. You wait in a line for ages, see all the excitement, hear screaming, but still you can't wait to get a ride. It's like the best thing in your whole day, summer, LIFE. And you'll get into that rollercoaster and it starts to move... higher, higher, higher... You've been waiting this for the whole day, summer, life. It goes up, up, up and suddenly you are unsure if this is going to be safe, good. What if the rollercoaster breaks and you end up crashing down? But while you are thinking this, you are already on top of that biggest high and you can't stop it. And then is a drop, a fast dive towards the bottom. And you scream, scream for a freedom and joy and adrenaline and the dive is faster and faster, deeper and deeper. It's all so great, because you are so much alive and so much dying at the same time. And you are reaching the bottom, you can see it already, but can't stop screaming for more. 'cos it's all you've been waiting for the whole day, summer, life and at some point you just don't...care... if it's going to be a crash landing, because deep in your heart it's what you've wanted, right?
Bill and Tom are in that dive now, after that high, crashing down fast and hard, but they scream, because it's too excited, too important not to. It's going to be a crash landing and there's nothing to stop it.
Did that make any sense?
Author's Response: I love the metaphor you used to describe it. When I first read this review, I grinned SO hard, it was a bit obnoxious. I always thoroughly enjoy and appreciate your thoughts on my work. You always manage to understand what I'm going for, especially in fics like this, where everything isn't exactly spelled out. Where it is this exciting and yet frightening thing called love takes over the characters' lives and does with them what it wills.
I'm so happy that you can understand that journey so well ^_^
Date: 01/02/10 03:31 pm Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
Oh god, that's so angsty, yet in the same time it isn't. And it all seems very real. As if all of that could really happen. Just tell me that soon Tom will love him without drugs, okay?
Love, Z.
Author's Response: yep, yep. I worked hard (kinda) on getting the right feel for this fic, so I'm glad that you liked it. Am glad that you found it to be realistic, and yea, he will ^_^
Date: 01/02/10 07:06 am Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
Guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Tom is finally behaving! But damn, I feel so bad for Bill! But I hope this shit stops from now on, because I have a feeling, Bill's not gonna have much people touch him anymore that isn't Tom. XD
Possessive much, Tomi? That's okay, we get it.
Author's Response: <3333
Date: 01/02/10 07:06 am Title: Chapter 7: Connect-The-Dots
Guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Tom is finally behaving! But damn, I feel so bad for Bill! But I hope this shit stops from now on, because I have a feeling, Bill's not gonna have much people touch him anymore that isn't Tom. XD
Possessive much, Tomi? That's okay, we get it.
Author's Response: lol. maybe. Kinda. You'll see in the next one. xD
Date: 12/28/09 06:55 pm Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
Ugh, Hime-sama this is reaaaaally something. It's fresh, and a new way to approach the drug use and stuff. Though, seriously, did you HAVE to do that to Bill? He's totally messed up! Hmph. Knowing you, i bet there's more to come...? *scared to ask* But as you should know, it's awesomely written, and somewhat easier to read (you just gotta keep pressin the 'down' button) though seeeriously angsty. Mkay, Toodles!
Author's Response: LOL, awww yay I'm glad you like it baby ^^ and yes, I did. Bill wanted it to happen. somehow. LOL. I'm glad it's an easy read and that you like it so much, your review made me happy ^_^
Date: 12/07/09 09:17 pm Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
Wow, intense indeed! Starting slowly and I just thought that Bill is seriously fucked up. I started to think that maybe he was more fucked up than people doing bad things to him... because he wants to be treated bad eventually, doesn't he? It's his drug like it is in here.
Until it came to see others hurt. Tom hurt. Then this got really intense. Torturing even... Can I say that in some ways hot? I don't know, it got me thrilled and heart bouncing in excitement to read him getting raped. I felt confused... I felt disgusted, because suddenly it started to get so raw.
The counting.. Jesus, it caused me so much anxiety. When I finished this I realised that I was so distressed and felt all the bad happenings in this world haunting me. Very powerful effect!
Author's Response: *nodnod* Yea, Bill's a really screwed up kid (you'll find out more in the next posted chapter), it truly amazes me how you get stuff about him, before I even post though xD
and lol, I get you, torture, rape it shouldn't be hot, but we're reading it through Bill's eyes, and to Bill, any sexual act including his twin (even if it's hurting the both of them in tandem), is hot, but then because it IS rape, it still has this raw intensity
And yea, the counting, I've got really bad anxiety problems, and I have to count when I feel myself being torn apart by my anxiety. It helps to make me forget whatever it is that's making me have an attack, and calm down enough so that I can rationalize what's happening. *shrugs* I knew I had to give it to Bill, and therefor to Tom. I just knew.
Date: 12/07/09 07:34 pm Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
O.o I like it
Author's Response: *smiles* yay, I'm glad you do
Date: 12/07/09 08:40 am Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
O_O OHHHHH MAMA....that was intense. GOOD as fuck. BUT.INTENSE. It wasn't even Bill's fault (stupid I'm-not-gay-but-I-Love-to-fuck-my-brother-when-I'm-high-only-when-I'm-high Tom!)
so yea...intense chapter, yes, but very very very good. :)
oh and Bushido, I'm kill you fool hurting my Billi!!! do what you want with Tom but leave Bill alone!
okay I'm done xD
Author's Response: LOL, *grins* pshhhhh. EVERYTHING is Bill's fault (he says so in the next already posted chapter) xD. Bill....has a shitload of issues, which causes the issues with Tom, which leads to the intensity of the chapter (that and he doesn't hold back his thoughts when telling you guys what happened) and Bushido is just doing his job. xD
Date: 12/07/09 01:03 am Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
Words. Cannot. Explain. Howmuchifuckinglovethis! You have a fucking gift. Wow. It's like 1 in the morning, I can't sleep, and I have school in 4 hours. But none of that matters now because this is so amazing. It's perfect because this is your style of writing and my favorite style to read (Ellen Hopkins fan, I think I told you that lol). Bill and Tom's characters are just so...broken. I don't think I have the right words to explain how I love this chapter (though it was so shocking), story, and you as a writer lol. (and it may just be due to the fact that I'm lacking sleep.) But keep writing! Btw, I'm also reading your new fic Monster. Pretty interesting so I'm looking forward to that too. ^_^.
Author's Response: *grins* Awwww, I'm glad that you like this (and Monster) so much. I enjoyed writing this, and enjoy posting it for you guys, cause even if the characters ARE so broken, and the fic is so angsty, you guys can still get into it ^_^
Date: 12/07/09 12:45 am Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
This is one of my favorite stories on this site. Amazing as always.
Author's Response: awww *blushes* thank you, it makes me happy to know that ^_^
Date: 12/06/09 11:34 pm Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
O_O
I really like the structure you use on this one.
Adds to the angst and makes Bill seem so fucked up.
But, I kinda got confused on the whole Bill Tom Bushido scene. So Bushido did Bill, then Tom did Bill, then Bushido did Bill right?
Author's Response: YAY. I love this type of writing, so I had fun writing this down. And honey, Bill really IS fucked up xD. And idk if I explained it over twitter or msn, but Bushido fucked Bill, then Tom fucked Bill, then Bushido fucked Tom. fun. xD
Date: 12/06/09 10:54 pm Title: Chapter 6: Counting Pain.
ouch ouch ouch. it hurts good though. intense.
Author's Response: lol. masochist. xD nah, just kidding. well sorta. I always think people are asking for a little bit of pain when they willingly walk into an angst fic. ^^
Date: 11/16/09 07:22 pm Title: Chapter 5: Murky Waters.
It's disturbing and fucking awsome at the sametime. I'm sick lol. Great chapter can't wait for more of Bill's fucked up world.
Author's Response: lololol. i'm glad you liked it xD
Date: 11/16/09 05:55 pm Title: Chapter 5: Murky Waters.
Nah, he isn't. There are no devils here. Just desperate people, fucked up people and people making money. I liked this, once again. The style. So weird, how it feels like a dream and floating in Bill's head. Being a fly at the ceiling to watch things and needs, emotions are VISIBLE as much as heppenings. Love and hate, denial... Love. Or is it? I feel sorry for Tom almost more than I feel sorry for Bill. I don't know why. He is so denial, it must be hard.
Author's Response: I love how you get this, SO WELL. I'm so picky and precise about the words because I want to portray something specific, and you get it like instantly. I'm glad that you do, because our writing styles often reflect each other. And yes, Tom's not meant to be a bad guy here, as much as it seems that way. It's just Bill's personal views. Lol
Date: 11/16/09 02:22 pm Title: Chapter 5: Murky Waters.
I seriously had a brain jizz after reading this chap (had to take a break before writing this review it was that amazing :P). this story is getting better and better. AND YAY! Bushido is here...ooooweeeee! :D
Author's Response: lol. WOAH. thats hot i think. and awww, that lets me know that i made this chapter as awesome as i hoed. and i'm glad you still like it, and i can only hope you like the new chapter.