Date: 06/18/09 12:58 am Title: Chapter 7
I like this a lot, really.
I always look forward to reading updates. Great story, good work. (:
Author's Response: im glad you like it :D rnand dont worry il update soon
Date: 06/17/09 08:30 pm Title: Chapter 1
i don't know y anyone would say tht. i luv ur stories :)
Author's Response: cause people want to make themselves happy?rnand thankx
Date: 06/17/09 04:30 pm Title: Chapter 7
This is such a great story! I love it! How could anybody want you to stop writing? Your an excellent writer and I LOVE all your stories. Please don't let anyone discourage you, ever. =)
Author's Response: thank you that means alot to me, dont worry i wont stop writing just becuase of them
Date: 06/17/09 03:25 pm Title: Chapter 7
those ppl that say that 2 u are bitches..just ignore them..plzplz update soon..i rly rly like thiz a lot=]=] thx=]
Author's Response: i will dont you worry about it D:
Date: 06/17/09 03:12 pm Title: Chapter 1
ofcourse im still reading! ive adopted this story aswell as evil andi! and the person writing those emails probably lacks all traces of talent and/or ability and ae insulting you as they are jealous and want to boost their o ego!
woohoo bad person eating! and justin time for dinner! XD
Author's Response: whoot :D
Date: 06/17/09 01:02 pm Title: Chapter 7
greetings earthling!
aww poor billa
1 andi is getting slowly meaner and meaner but woohoo go tom for being his knight in oversized armour!
any whatsit i am still loving this and btw who ent you emails like that? i will track them down nd eat them and if you stop writing your stories i will have to track you down and hypnotise you into writing again!!
anywho
caant wait for the next update
much love
Ellie avoiding revision
xXx
ps i have official dopted you evil andreas!
Author's Response: whhay :D im glad yout still reading :S rni dont no who is sending me those emails, i wish i knew myself that way i could andwer them and not have to try and find out through this. rnand i will update soon i promise.. and.. ell you can eat thiem xD
Date: 06/17/09 12:48 pm Title: Chapter 7
Good work! This is simply amazing. Even though I've already told you that, I thought I'd leave it in a review!
And I love the way you ended the chapter! Great job! : D *hands you a plate of cookies and gummie worms... and... BILL*
Author's Response: YAY rn-eats gummi bears and cookies and bill- WHOOOT he was tasty ;)
Date: 06/17/09 10:39 am Title: Chapter 7
I like it. And don't worry about it, it takes time!
May I give you some constructive criticism, though?
-The plot is good, very thought out. However,
-You should include a tiny bit more detail, and work on grammatical structure. You have a lot of run-on sentences, and there are some places that are missing punctuation.
-Wording. Be careful how you word things. Some of your sentences are worded incorrectly.
-Location. Make sure that you make it clear where the characters are so that nobody is confused about location. For example, in the first paragraph, I thought that Bill was at home, so when you had Andreas confront him, I didn't know where they were until you said that Bill crashed into a locker. It makes it a bit difficult to imagine the setting, which makes it difficult to fully see things playing out in my mind.
Other than that, you're doing fine! Now, I'm not trying to be mean, mind you. I just wanted to give you some friendly, constructive criticism to help you improve. :)
I'm not sure if you need a beta or not, but if you do, I'd be happy to do it for you. :)
And don't be discouraged by those people who are sending you those nasty emails. Tokio Hotel Fiction is a site where ANYONE can write stories, not just people who they think can write. So ignore them, because they're just being mean spirited. Besides, if they don't like your story, nobody's forcing them to read it. And, there are plenty of people who are enjoying this. You wouldn't have so many reviews if there weren't. :)
Author's Response: Thank you for the wise words, i never really noticed i was missing location lol XD i dont think i was really paying 100% attention to what i was writing so thank you for that. rnrnand sure i have a beta.. dawn tends to do a lovely job =] thank you for the offer though i will keep it in mind
Date: 06/17/09 10:34 am Title: Chapter 1
YAY! More! I was going to kill you for hurting Bill, but I will have to wait till you have your halfcat halfhedgehog twins. Till then you have time to have Tom fix Bill, and then I won't kill you.
Author's Response: il fix him i promise :D rnand yes =/ my babies XDDD
Date: 06/14/09 04:12 pm Title: Chapter 6
Gah, even though I am already reading this beforehand, it still manages to make me want to read it again and again. Keep the good job.
Author's Response: im glad you do to be honest, it makes me really happy when i see your reviews.. :D
Date: 06/14/09 01:00 pm Title: Chapter 6
HOWDY!!!
anywho sorry i didnt ramble on the last chapter i didnt see it in recently updated (i was away form my computer for a few days) but now i am backkkkk anywhatsit awww Billas in love! and Tom has come out ina truely fabulous manner now hasnt he lol andi is a bitch and i love him lol way more fun to read than the normal quiet companionable andi which gets dull after a while :)ohhh and just so ya know i am now tracking this story and have favourited caus i think its just that gosh darn groovy!
anywatsit
cant wait forthe next love
much love
Ellie with very little sleep
xXx
Author's Response: Im glad you still read it :D and im happy you have faved and tracking it. i have already had a few reviews about how stupid it is.. so im glad you like it :D rnandi, well i have some plans for him ;p
Date: 06/13/09 11:25 pm Title: Chapter 6
i love it
poor bill they hurt him :/
but tomi is soo brave to stand up to those ppl :)
Author's Response: tomi is soi awsom im starting to love him XD
Date: 06/13/09 10:53 pm Title: Chapter 6
awe! omg i loved the end to this! its so sweet and i loved the tom threatning them all lmao tellement funny! (really funny in case you dont noe french) loved the chapters!
Author's Response: tom is awsome :D rnand yes i no french.. some XD rnand thank you
Date: 06/13/09 10:01 pm Title: Chapter 6
plzplzplzpzlpzl update sooon thx soso much=]
Author's Response: hehe will do
Date: 06/13/09 07:35 pm Title: Chapter 5
i rly like this...plzpzl update SOOON thx=]
Author's Response: will doi so
Date: 06/13/09 07:09 pm Title: Chapter 5
yes, it's bad >_
Author's Response: thanx -_-
Date: 06/10/09 06:23 pm Title: Chapter 1
tom on toast...mine!!
ill say this one more time..DO NOT RUSH YOURSELF
if ya rush then i will take away your bill toast!
xXx
Author's Response: i wont rush.. i promise rncross my heart stick bills eyeliner up his nose :D rn
Date: 06/10/09 05:59 pm Title: Chapter 1
awesomesaucem on toast caus everything is better on toast!
Author's Response: bill on toast.. mine!"
Date: 06/10/09 05:54 pm Title: Chapter 1
well its going great at the moment and i lve it to :D seriously waitig an extra day or two wont make people lse interest especially if it means that the updates they get are better!*glomps*
COFFEEE!!!
much love
Ellie who's hyper
xXx
Author's Response: im in the middle of writing the next onernyou get to see more andreas : D
Date: 06/10/09 05:45 pm Title: Chapter 1
YAY!! my comments feel loves :D
I think bits of it will feel rushed if your trying to rush yourself to get it finished so you can post it for us greedy readers but in all honesty it would be better if you wwaited a bit longer untiil you were (or i was) completely happy with it. the readers won tmind waiting a little. If you dont feel comfortable writing then dnt write it. only write what you comfortable writing its not worthmaking you edgey just to feed our sick minds lol. Im noticing (quite happily) a recent trend of Andi not being the good guy constantly although he normallystill is its nice to have andi written froma different point of view so danke schon!
much love
Ellie with coffer XD
xXx
Author's Response: i love this story with my heart, i just dont want people to lose interest in it rnhopefully i can get it alot better