Date: 06/22/09 11:45 am Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
He had successfully stolen two before a wooden spoon came down on the back of his hand lightly.
Hehehe, favorite line in the whole thing :) I think it is because that always seemed to happen to me, except maybe with freshly baked cookies, but the idea is still there :) so it means I can imagine that even better :) See now that Tom has talked to his 'dad' it just gets me thinking, how in the world have they ended up apart, when Simone is pretty darn positive that Tom died.
"Did you, by any chance, leave a red shirt in the hotel room, do you know?"
hehehe, they are just so fun together, hopefully the lying thing won't become a common thing for them to do to each other, but I bet I'm just worrying myself too much :) you would never be that mean, at least I can only hope not :) lol, and then as Bill said Tom, I thought he was going to catch him on the lie or something, and I was going to go, HA! Take that Tomi for lying! but then it wasn't, and Tom had to tell Bill the news about his dad. Oh, puts a damper on everything for Bill. Lost shirt and he probably fucked his brother...
"We aren't until DNA proves it,"
Ouchies...I like how Tom is sort of clinging onto that last hope that they aren't twins, and he really wasn't fucking his brother. I mean how well can a person seriously take that? I don't know if you're going to take this all the way to DNA testing, or Tom's parents are going to own up to it. They must have some sort of reason...maybe Tom was put into testing for something or other...but whatever the reason, I hope it isn't so much that Tom starts hating his parents from taking him away from his brother :) *squeeze* as almost always I wish there was more description...*blushes* it would make the chapter longer ;)
Author's Response: My mom used to crack me all the time with a spoon. I was ALWAYS into the food, whether it was just after grocery shopping or when I was supposed to help make dinner. I would like to hear your theory about how they ended up apart. I know what I have planned, but I still wanna know what you think. The lying may become more common, but it'll just be stupid stuff. Like, I dunno, Tom catches Bill wearing his hat or something, and Bill looked up in shock going "I don't know how that happened" sort of thing. No big lies, just fun ones. Tom's kind of ok with the brother thing. He just doesn't care. He just wants Bill. But I think he's just afraid as to how Bill'd react if it was official, you know? As for more detail....I write my chapters from 1AM-3AM (sometimes 3:30). . . .Is it understandable why I don't add so much description? XD
Date: 06/22/09 09:50 am Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
i do love you which is why i'm reviewing....so uh, twins huh?...i need more more more!!! please? n//n
Author's Response: Yeah. . .twins.. .. who woulda thunk it? Thanks for reviewing and making me feel loved!
Date: 06/22/09 07:41 am Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
Well, I'll review, but not only because I love you, which I do for writing this story...and others, but that's other story. Anyway, what I wanted to say...this has to come up quicker, because it's really making me on edge. And yay! at Tom not caring about blood relations. Now we just have to have Bill join the club.
You get cookies for this.
Author's Response: Yay! I feel loved. As much as I would LOVE to post more, I can't. I have too many stories to keep up with XD And WOOOO! for the cookies. I love cookies. Danke!
Date: 06/22/09 06:06 am Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
MORE SOON.. iz all i can say today. sadly.
Author's Response: While it is sad that's all you have to say, I'm still glad you said it XD
Date: 06/22/09 12:08 am Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
Oh wow...so the truth is coming out...eventually....damn the stalling!! I just realized I seem to be reading alot of your fan fics, random I know...but its true.
Author's Response: It's because I'm everywhere O.O
Date: 06/21/09 11:48 pm Title: Part One: Meeting - Chapter One: Getting There
no problem, and it really is a good story :)
Date: 06/21/09 11:41 pm Title: Part One: Meeting - Chapter One: Getting There
nothing really, just build up to things a little more, like when they asked their parents about them having a twin, Simone broke down a little fast, but other than that it's good :)
Author's Response: Hmm ok. Thanks. I'll try to keep stuff like that in mind
Date: 06/21/09 11:39 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
I'm assuming the next chapter will be them actually meeting up?
It's going to be interested to find out the real story behind Bill and Tom's parents. Tom did only say he saw resemblance between him and his father...so mother anyone...
Author's Response: Yes, actually next chapter IS them meeting up XD I even have a little section done
Date: 06/21/09 11:33 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Seven: What To Think?
i don't see how they're dealing with all of that, my brain would have stopped working already if i was them, it's a good story, but it moved a little fast, i still like it though.
Author's Response: Thank you. I appreciate that. Any suggestions for what I can do to make it better?
Date: 06/21/09 08:32 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
grr. cliff hanger...update soon! i need more!!! *weeps in pain*
Author's Response: I'm sorry! There's a chappie going up tonight!
Date: 06/17/09 12:21 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
O.O he knows and he is not shocked at all!! :)
Author's Response: Well considering the pieces he put together earlier. . .Now, shocked would be learning he and say. . .Gusti were twins o.O XD
Date: 06/16/09 12:30 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
hehehe, the chapter wasn't that bad :) *blushes* I'm busier during the summer, pathetic excuse... So yeah, here's the longer review, or at least I hope it ends up longer :)
Over the course of three days, he'd managed to find his soul mate, fall in love, and lose him.
That was just like the saddest line to me. Because *giggles* you told me they were twins, and it was just, omg!!! There was just so much irony (think that's the word) in the statement and it made me want to hug Bill. Because it is so wonderful that he found his soul mate, but then OMG!!!! It's his brother, which sort of puts a whole damper on his soul mate parade :(
"WHAT?!"
"Huh? Oh um. . . .yeah. I'm . . I'm not a virgin anymore."
Um...so despite the whole, "omg this sucks, I fucked my twin brother" and how it is horrible and all that, I was sort of laughing. It is just caps always get me laughing and then the way Bill answered, I can just see him looking down, and like picking his nails. And then getting this goofy smile on his face, remembering how he lost his virginity. Oh poor Simone.
"Mmm," Tom purred into the phone. "Guess what?"
"What?"
"I get my car next week! I get my car next week!" Tom said in a singsong voice.
This dialogue part was so cute :) I just saw Tom like holding the phone and in this sexy voice, licking his lips and saying his line. and Bill having an almost breathless response. Then like Tom going all hyper like a squirrel, or like hyped up on candy, and bouncing on his knees. hehehe, that's my image.
Ooo, that leads me to this thought, I love reading dialogue, and that is how you write, a lot of dialogue, but sometimes I wish you'd put more description in :) like maybe on the way Bill is sitting when he talks, which idk, is just sort of something I always image when someone is talking, the way they're sitting. But that is just me :) hehehe, but go on writing this way, you always seem to be able to put emotion into all the talking, even without lots of desrciption (which can get boring I admit) which is so amazing :) *giggles* poor Simone, and I know I shouldn't quite be laughing but...at least they don't have to hide their relationship from her :)
Author's Response: WOOO! I get my awesome lengthed reviews back! WEEE! You actually don't even know how happy this had made me. Not even joking. *laughs* I loved when Simone found out. I totally don't know what I would do. I can totally picture Bill doing exactly that. *Giggles* You so describe my characters better than I do. You know, I never thought about describing how they sit and such. I shall see if I remember to try next chapter XD Thanks so much for coming back to just leave a monster review, especially because you're busier XD I wuv you
Date: 06/16/09 12:06 am Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
MORE MORE MORE! I LOVE IT!!!
Date: 06/15/09 09:34 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
Daaayyum. What a way for a mother to fond out her sons not a virgin anymore. :P
Author's Response: I know! I don't know what I would've done
Date: 06/15/09 08:11 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
oh gosh they're twins woot!
Author's Response: Yesh! They are twins
Date: 06/15/09 05:31 pm Title: Part One: Meeting - Chapter Four: A Night Out Of Characters
That picture was AMAZING! Oh, I just loved it soooo much, I can't even think straight right now. *drool* I may not be a lesbian, but I can surely appreciate a sexy woman when I see one, even though he's not actually a woman. I like him in women's clothes.
Oh, yeah, I liked the chapter too. It was so sweet. All that first time anxiety and frustration just melts my heart. Going great!
Date: 06/15/09 05:17 pm Title: Part One: Meeting - Chapter Three: Morning Studies
I liked this chapter. I would have enjoyed them rolling around half naked and getting sweaty, but this just helps to build the suspence and sexual frustration. This is going to be so much fun!
Date: 06/15/09 05:11 pm Title: Part One: Meeting - Chapter Two: Meeting Up
I don't like Jube Jubes, but if you have Reeces Pieces, I'll take some of those, thanks.
OK, so, Bill and Tom resemble each other and have the same last name. Co-inky-dink? Maybe... lol
I love games! Especially when played by (or with) really hot guys. I can't wait to see who the winner is.
Date: 06/15/09 05:02 pm Title: Part One: Meeting - Chapter One: Getting There
I must admit, I'm not very into manga, but I figured I'd give this a shot, since you're the writer. I am familiar with Sailor Moon, but that's it. OH! And Fullmetel Alchemist, but I see those guys aren't on your little list thingie. No matter.
Loved the first chapter. But wait, there's more...
Date: 06/15/09 12:38 pm Title: Part Two: Realization - Chapter Six: Home Sweet Home?
....
omg, that is a horrible way to find out you have a twin brother. And then for Simone to find out that hey, her son isn't a virgin anymore, and he lost to by his twin. lol, I love how even Bill just realized he fucked his twin brother, as he gracefully puts it, he still gets the shivers when Tom called him cuddles :) lol, I found that so cute :) hehehe, installment 2!!! *squeeze* lol, I feel so sorry for Simone, but sort of laughing at the same time. lol :) lovely mother :)
Author's Response: It really is a horrible way. I swear, if I was Simone . . .gah, I don't even know what I would've done. Yeah, Bill's a little too smitten to care if there is relation. At first, I didn't even realize the review was from you. It was alot shorter than usual. Was the chapter that bad?