Reviews For Booty Call
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Reviewer: screamtillyoufeelit Signed [Report This]
Date: 08/14/12 06:50 pm Title: Booty Call

i havnt been on this site in months so this was a good way to get back into it, a very good way..

Reviewer: tokiohotelprincess Signed [Report This]
Date: 05/24/11 02:35 am Title: Booty Call

OMG part 2 PLEASE :)

Reviewer: innocent as far as you know Signed [Report This]
Date: 09/29/10 09:31 pm Title: Booty Call

i really like this, please make another chapter as to why she is in the car with them and whats going on. update soon!

Reviewer: Ema21 Signed [Report This]
Date: 06/29/10 06:16 am Title: Booty Call

Ok, so I was really waiting for someone to write some twin DP, so I'm really happy you wrote this.... but at the same time, I'm really sorry, this was a let down. :(
It starts off as a song fic, and that's ok, I just ignore the song lyrics... And then it got confusing with all the different guys the slutty female lead danced with... And then you got Bill drunk which was fun, lol... And then you introduced that the 2 guys are brothers and your writing had this "I'm totally writing this as a dreamy blur intentionally" feel, which was cool I guess... But then the club has a bedroom in the back?? which doesn't make sense, but i'll excuse it for the story plot purposes... Oh boy, and this is around the time you started reffering to the brothers as friends and it really made me wonder if this story was actually written for another fandom but had the names switched and the author forgot to change a few other words? Hope that's not true... And then, oh boy, the story started looking like some really cheap porno. I'm sorry dude. And the sentences were all over the place, with non-understandable pronouns, and switching from one idea to another too fast. I don't know if that was a stylistic thing you were trying to go for, but if it was, I think you rushed through writing it and editing it, and it wasn't effective. For me it just sounded disjointed. I think towards the end of the sex scene and after the story fell apart and was really rushed, kind of like you just wanted to finish it off, and that's how your character sounded too. Actually, in the end she sounded like a slutty drunk bratty teenager who thinks she rules the world. Lol.
Yeah, I would go back and clean up your ideas and write sentences in a way that isn't as confusing for the reader to know which character you're talking about i.e. who's doing a certain action.
I think this story has potential, like I said- twin DP is fucking sexy and would make for a killer story, I just hope you'll take the time to thoroughly edit and rephrase things etc in this story to bring some real life into it so it doesn't sound so much like cheap porn.
I'm always so sad to leave a bad review, I just don't want to lie to someone, and on the other hand I hope I've been constructive enough that I may have helped a bit. I dunno. Forgive me. :(
I am looking forward to seeing this story rewritten properly though, to do the plot some justic, ok? I know u can do it. :)

Reviewer: Iknowyourelyingtome Signed [Report This]
Date: 06/11/10 07:14 pm Title: Booty Call

Oooooooh that's mighty awesome :]

Author's Response: thank you

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